There was a time in the American culture when women like Marilyn Monroe, Jayne Mansfield, Rita Hayworth, and Lana Turner were the epitome of what a sex symbol was. They were the bombshells and the goddesses that we ogled from near and far, and there wasn’t a man in the country who didn’t have a pinup of them somewhere in their garage.
Do you know how we refer to these absolutely gorgeous women today? Do you know how we revere their memory and honor their beauty?
We call them fat.
The idea of what beautiful is has changed so drastically over the years that the women mentioned above would never be the superstars they were, but instead they would have to deal with magazine covers and delightful names like “Wide Load” “Big Girl” and, if you are not in the US, straight out things like “Fat Ass” and “Pigilicious”.
This breaks my heart. I did not grow up with Marilyn Monroe as an idol, I am a bit young for that, but I did grow up loving women of every shape and size. As I was educated by school systems and myself, I realized that the shapely woman was the form that mankind worshipped for 500 generations before Twiggy came along and destroyed the ideals of beauty forever.
That’s right, I said worshipped. Fertility statues, such as the Venus of Willendorf, were what mankind looked for in a woman in times past. Full hips, large breasts and a larger frame inferred that the woman would be an excellent mother. A mother, without which our species would have dwindled down to nothingness 50,000 years ago on the frozen plains of Europe.
For those of you wanting a more recent example, take the works of Peter Paul Rubens, this man, who the word rubenesque was invented in honor of, showed women the way they both truly were, and were desired to be. Large breasts, wide hips, and a soft and plump body is what was considered beautiful.
Where did we go wrong?
I wish I could pinpoint a date, and then go back in time and make everyone love one another the way it ought to be. But unfortunately, it was a series of events over the course of decades that gradually focused the eyes of the males of the world on the smaller waist and frame as a beautiful, as opposed to the larger.
I am not against women of any size, I am against the labeling of what size of woman is unattractive due to forced societal norms. It is asinine and cruel, and for the most part, largely American in origin, as well. Since America never shuts up, and screams the loudest in every conversation, we seem to push the beauty ideals for a great swathe of the world.
This makes me incredibly sad. I am delighted to be a admirer of plus sized women. I am pleased to say I prefer a larger waist, stomach and breasts than nearly all of my peers. I love women, I worship them for the true progenitors that they are. They are mother; they are life, and I refuse to believe that Nicole Ritchie is the face of beauty and perfection when we have women like Adele, Tyra Banks, and Mia Tyler.
So my friends, we have lost our way. We have gone from seeing women as goddesses and beings of immense beauty, to seeing them as fragile, broken things that need to be nearly emaciated for us to call them them whole, real, and beautiful.
How do we get back?
Dayna
I’ve notice that where I live a lot of couples are skinny guys and big women. I always thought that if I was skinnier I would be happier and attract more guys.
Chris
Marilyn Monroe and Rita Hayworth were not and never would be called fat by any sane person I know (though Marilyn was perhaps a little on the chubbier side).
The photo you provide with the article, though, is fat and possibly obese. This is unhealthy.
BIanca
Marilyn Monroe WAS a size 12/14 that is a TODAYS size 4/6.
She was never fat she did have her moments were she did gained weight, a few pounds and may have been considered “chubby” but she always lost the weight and always felt uncomfortable and depressed with that extra weight on.
Some Guy
We haven’t “lost our way.” You’re talking about a fetish, IE BBW. That photo up there? BBW. A “plump” woman has curves and a full figure, but is not in danger of heart disease. Encouraging people to be obese to satisfy some fetish is just, to put it bluntly, crazy.
Marylin Monroe had curves in all the right places, but in no stretch of the word was she fat. We’ve lost our way in the sense that “curvy” or “full figured” is some rally cry for the obese to feel better about themselves. Cut the crap and just accept that you’re overweight. Being obese is not healthy and it’s only sexy to some people. Don’t hide behind the mask of “curvy and full figured” as an excuse to be lazy and not exercise.
The only reason larger women were regarded as attractive in the early years of humanity was because we burned off everything we ate trying to run villages and find more stuff to eat. It was the ideal to be heavier; it meant you had more to eat and could birth healthier children. Now, with access to medical advancements, dietitians, and a wider selection of foods, obesity shouldn’t be a problem.
It is a problem, however. We have become sedentary. Everything comes to us and we do not need to hunt or gather. Most of our jobs involve sitting. On top of all this, we’re too lazy to go for a jog or play a sport. We abandon health for convenience.
So, no, obesity is not sexy. Larger women (or people in general) have no excuse (outside of medical reasons- like thyroid conditions or joint issues) to be obese. (As an aside, I personally don’t find ultra skinny women to be attractive either. Balance is everything)
Bubble_Bunnie
Two lovely people I know use the term “voluptuous” in it’s original meaning to describe me: a woman whose shape implies sexuality or illicits sexual thoghts. I am not obese but no one would ever call me thin. While I do not think that it is right to verbally abuse anyone who doesn’t fit into what is currently trending in regards to society, nor do I think that it is okay to be unhealthily heavy. Heavy women were worshipped because the availibility of food was equated with wealth. Today, obeseity is a danger to those wishing to live a long life. And is especially dangerous in pregnant women. A overweight woman can easily get diabetes and pass it on to her child. Not to mention a host of other health issues.
Uenvi_me
WOW..I for one hate the term BBW, unless its on the back of my bath and body works products…I am 5ft 5 inches and LOOK like I weigh 170..I actually weigh 206 EXACTLY…I find it odd to be referred to as a BBW when I see plus size models weighing 306 yet are 5 ft 11..their bodies will Look entirely different from mine I do think that I am curvy and full figured..I also do not like that these terms and stipulations DON’T apply to a male//they are muscular, athletic, brute etc not a BSM Big sexy male etc.. YES the picture is of a FAT person. I don’t think in modern times there is a woman who ever was a fat success. Maybe they did start off as skinny get fat and try to return to skinny but FAT from the start, NO..Rickki Lake, Kirtie Alley, Queen Latifah etc. may pop up but look at their heights. We hardly know anyone’s height anymore due to TV and angles so anyone on TV and print can be made to look fatter or skinnier than REAL everyday women…AND YES we have lost our way but back then did they have the level of hate that we have now NO…They had bigger issues to worry about..Society now has nothing but Excess so of course we will never return to a time of appreciating anything, especially not anyone’s heavier bodies…SAD!
Silverdrop
Wow… so many comments insisting that overweight people have lost their right to be considered beautiful sexual people because of their weight. Is it unhealthy? Yes. We know it. You don’t have to tell us over and over again. None of us have perfectly healthy lifestyles, and I’m not stepping into your life to point out all the things you do wrong.
If you don’t find us beautiful, that’s fine. But don’t tell me I shouldn’t find myself beautiful. Because I do.
Kao
Firstly, whether you agree, disagree or are indifferent to the ideas in My post, I thank you for commenting on it and, for the most part, attempting civil discourse.
I wrote this knowing there was going to be a very negative overall reaction. People saying I was glorifying obesity and laughing in the faces of a aunt/sister/daughter they had that died of a weight related medical condition.
I also wrote this for the few of you who seem to share similar sentiments. Who see the way that we have turned in a nation obsessed not with healthy thin girls, but skeletal rails of human beings.
I will take both with the Internet based grain of salt I must and happily prepare My next post on the subject.
nana.inuk
I am neither thin nor fat, I have a bit of tummy chub and my boyfriend says it’s his favourite thing about my body ^_^ I find that so sweet! I think that women of all shapes and sizes should be respected and loved, and encouraged to love themselves.
Hannee
I would have to say that MODERATION is key. Neither anorexic nor obesity is sexy… because it’s unnatural and unhealthy. When the pendulum has swung too far to the other side, it usually overcompensates by swinging in the full force to the opposite direction. How to find our way back? Be accepting, be moderate, embrace the diversity of the spectrum.
Remi
“I love women, I worship them for the true progenitors that they are. They are mother; they are life, and…”
Apparently, I have lost my right to be admired, to be worthy, to be beautiful, because I am not mother, nor will I ever be. Because I have no desire to be “life” to be “progenitor”, am I not as good?
You may not have meant to do it, most people don’t, but the implication that women are only “worthy” when they want to be or are mothers hurts some of us worse than the implication that we’re only beautiful when we’re thin. The idea that we’re only beautiful for our ability to reproduce is tragic.
Jaeleen
Thank you so much for a great post!
MissStormRyder
I’m not sure where you got the idea this nation is obssesed with “skeletal rails of human beings”
For being the most obese nation on the planet I personally find most people defining female beauty based on health and fitness.
Some runway models are very thin to the point of looking like nothing more than bones but I have seen some in the fashion industry say that has to end and some models have been denied work for being too thin. Just from what I see in movies, tv and magazines most women are in a normal size range with some extremes from time to time…If we were truly obessed with ultra thin women we would be seeing them in every area of the media and I for one just don’t see that.
Kristie
I think it’s interesting that someone commented that Marilyn Monroe was a 12/14 and would not have ever been considered fat. I am a size 14, and I am referred to as fat often. These days, a woman who is a size 8 is considered “plus size.” Everyone who is against this article would probably put me in the “obese” category…. but you’re just proving the point made in the article.