How my vibrator ruined my night!

You all know what it’s like!  You get a new toy.  It’s shiny, and smooth, and has all the right vibrations and patterns.  You lay down with your husband.  You get all lubed up.  You start to warm up…
Vrrroooom.  Vroom. Vroom. Vroom.  *nothing*

You think to yourself… “Well, damnit!  Maybe it’s not the batteries.  Maybe the battery compartment is not closed right.”  You open the compartment, check the batteries, make sure everything’s secure, and close it up.  Hit the “On” button and VROOOOOOOOOM.  Yes! Victory! “It’s OK honey, I must have done something to knock the battery compartment loose.” You start cycling through the patterns, warming yourself up.  Again!
Vrrooom. Vroom. Vroom. Vroom. Vrroooooommmm. *nothing*

“Well, ain’t that a SONOFABITCH!”  You admit to yourself that the batteries must be the culprit.  You dig around the night stand.  You know you had a couple of extra batteries in there!  Finding them, you hurry up and get them into the vibrator.  You’re irritated and frustrated, but you know that as soon as you get the compartment closed you’re going to have the five (yes, FIVE! I’m multiorgasmic, thankyouverymuch!) best orgasms you’ve ever had because you worked so damn hard for them!

Turn it on. *nothing*

*Grumblegrumble, mother fucking piece of shit, damnit to hell in a hand basket, I wanted orgasms mother fucker! grumblegrumble*

Now you have a pout face on.  You’re pissed off.  Horny, but not turned on anymore. And then….
Your husband says to you, “Don’t worry about it sweetie, we have more AAAs in the basement.  If you really want to use this toy, just go get them, they’re in the end table drawer.”

“I’m not going to get pants on to walk down two flights of stairs into the cold basement just to get some batteries!”

“Well, I can just give you one manually!  Or you can get your glass toy warmed up!”
Ordinarily, those options would be fantastic, but you’re already over the whole damn thing!  You’re mad that your toy isn’t turning on.  You have that vague thought in the back of your head that says, “What if I go to the store and get batteries and it still doesn’t work?  Did I get a dud?  Did I do something wrong cleaning it after last time?  I checked for water and didn’t find any!”

“Nah, honey.  Thanks.  I am just not in the mood anymore.”  Which is mostly true.  Truthfully you’re still thinking about the offer of the glass with your favorite clit stimulator, which your husband has been fidgeting with since this whole ordeal started.  You get up and open your drawer to retrieve your pouch when you hear: “Uh oh.  This one just broke!”  You look around and sure enough, the base that was only slightly cracked (from a child-related incident involving snoopy, kids, and them stepping on it) is now broken to the point where it no longer closes.  At all.  No more vibrations.

“Well. SHIT!  Now I’m DONE!”

What?  That’s never happened to you?