A formidable combination of sizzling bacon, percolating coffee, and a ray of radiant sunshine finally stirred Rick out of a seemingly deep stupor. Ripples of confusion corrupted his consciousness. A wave of near vertigo level washed over him. The foreign bed rendered him disoriented.

Vague recollections of a debaucherous night came back to him in droves. Wiping the crust from his eyes, he studied the unusual apparatus suspended above him. Pulleys. Slings. Cables. A mirrored ceiling lifted more discombobulating droves.

The neighbor, his neighbor Anita Mille, wild vixen she was. Idly he reached down for his masculine scratch and scrub. Peering south down the satin sheets he found it remarkable to be without clothing. It wasn’t like him to sleep naked.

That’s right. An impromptu sexcapade initiated shortly after his arrival for the barbeque and beers. Well, minus the barbeque and double the beers, it wasn’t difficult to do the math in this equation. Now more satisfied sexually than, well, ever his belly rumbled maliciously. The scent of bacon sizzling in the next room and melted butter tantalized him further.

He’d recalled performing like a mad man, going for seemingly hours on end. That explained his raw chafing and extreme dehydration. Rolling out of bed, Rick stumbled briefly then walked to the adjacent bathroom.

Stimulated he was, hair raised on end as he relieved himself. He was astonished that it went on and on. Jesus, even his ass was stiff, along with every other muscle, some places he never realized he had.

Several areas along his sides and chest were matted with dried secretion. For a moment he considered showering but was too anxious to see his sexy hostess. He compromised for a quick splash to freshen up instead.

Taking a deep breath, his belly rumbled again, then fluttered nervously. Something about this demure diva thrilled him to unchartered heights. Never had someone lead him on an odyssey of sexual awakening, leaving inhibition at home, and bringing dripping hot desire and sheer arousal en route for the journey. She had so much to teach. He had so much to share. Imagine if he’d met her two years ago. In one night alone, he thought without doubt he had enough material to start a new novel.

Departing the construction industry, leaving Toronto, and splitting from Jenn all proved to be wise, progressive choices. As he tucked the towel into his waist, he planned on toasting his neighbor to new beginnings. With a boyish grin, he practically glided into the next room with an eye out for his discarded clothes along the way.

The more recollection of details crept back the more Rick beamed quite astounded and pleased with himself. The site unfolded unto him placed him in an instant trance. With her back towards him, Anita worked diligently on the counter and stove top. Her cinnamon sculpted legs shimmered beneath a flimsy, leopard print robe.

The sight of her hour-glass physique twitched his virtually pureed man-wad. Deciding to surprise her with hopefully a fraction of the same affect she had on him, he crept up behind her. A heart shaped Heine silhouette stirred his primal desires. An elegant matching thong peered through the bottom of her hiked robe as she reached into the cupboard above the sink.

Suddenly all Rick wanted was that irresistible rump served rare for breakfast. He could sink his teeth in and savor her aromatic flavor all morning. Creeping closer he hoped to give his neighbor the morning greeting of all time.

He snickered, glimpsing down at his protruding towel. This dynamo turned his crank in ways he never thought was possible. His plans at engaging in the element of surprise were successful, just not in the manner he’d planned. Anita shrieked and jumped, tossing the plastic bowl high into the air.

Rick jumped in retaliation, clearly surprised at how she’d turned around. Pancake flour flew recklessly into the air in a white cloud of shocked spontaneity.

“What the fuck, Rick?” She screamed. Her fury eclipsed her startled spectacle. Puffs of flour rained down her hair and shoulders.

“I’m sorry,’ he gestured towards her struggling to subdue a devilish, imbecilic grin. In all the chaos his towel slipped off onto the linoleum.

It was now Rick’s turn to be shocked. His multi-purpose genetic whisk stood straight out, offering to stir even the most stubborn of lady batters. She clasped a hand upon her face, stifling a fit of infectious laughter. By this time, the bowl had landed, swiveling in its infinite kilter swirl. Awkwardly it was the only noise heard in the busy kitchen.

In sync, they burst into fresh bouts of laughter. Unbridled, carefree roars unleashed until their cheeks ached and their bellies clinched.

“I was going to make you breakfast in-“

“Jeez I’m sorry I was only trying to-“

“Whoops, you go-“

“Didn’t mean to interrupt, I-“

Respectively they gazed at the powdered linoleum.

“You know. I can tell you’ll age gracefully-“

“Excuse me?” A frown furrowed upon her angelic face. She was perhaps most perplexed by this potentially offensive remark from someone standing there stark naked before her.

“The white hair,” he started towards her, twirling her locks. “It really becomes you.” Anita pushed the smirking jerk in mocking defiance. To show him she would not be hornswaggled, she grabbed a handful of the remaining half mixed batter and slung it at him.

Making a schmucking sound, a copious amount stuck to his face and slid down his cheek. Hilariously enough, it stuck to his stir stick before clopping onto the floor. Rick watched it fall in slow motion. Initially his belief system refused to admit such a brazen attack had ensued. He adored her all the more for it.

Manically, hysterically, Anita laughed, bouncing up and down in self professed victory all the while. At first, he refused to acknowledge she had one up on him, neglecting to meet eye contact. He held a solitary index finger up, gradually making his way over to the refrigerator. She was fully submersed in cackling laughter (with a hint of moisture in her panties) glaring at Rick’s wavering boner.

One may suggest Rick was right at home, helping himself to the fridge’s contents. With a whoosh and universal click of the interior light, he was guided to the can of whipped cream. As he popped up the cap, he dove towards her, perhaps a little too over confident with such vulnerable extremities exposed.

Swiftly, he grabbed her forehead and sprayed recklessly all over her face. She struggled in vain. Rick’s attempts were orchestrated with much vigor, overpowering her. Surely her nonstop laughter hand managed to weaken her state.

Demanding full, utter and complete surrender, he sprayed onward expelling a good quantity of the can. She’d shriek, if not being bombarded by mouthfuls of whipped cream every time she opened her mouth. Two hands flailed against his forearm. Relentless, he was expelling the frothy cream all over her neck and onto her smooth, impressive cleavage. Even her satiny baby doll was smeared.

Tenaciously they each struggled. Grunts and groans filled the kitchen air. Spurts of laughter weakened one at a time, giving the other the advantage. A shriek of another nature unleashed as Rick pressed and smeared his lips and cheeks against her chest. Hungrily he suckled and nibbled at her creamy centers.

Within a flash, all resistance dwindled from Anita. Her cries and laughter traded in for coos and purrs of approval. Through satiny layers, Rick nuzzled, poking and swaying her thick nipples. He sighed. His hot breath awakened the rest of her flesh. She pawed at the back of his head, clenching his hair playfully. Rick suckled harder, mixing the cream nightgown and areolas against the roof of his mouth, tickling with his teeth.

Before she knew it, Anita was grinding her lady crease upon his thigh. Her tussled enchantment soaked through her g-string, straight through. The musk upon his thigh encouraged his arousal. His neighbor drove him mad with passion. To prove his very epiphany, he reached down behind her, cupping her buns. He hoisted her ruggedly onto the counter. Her flower doused locks and sticky creamed chest made quite a sight. Rick scraped batter off his meat whisk and flicked it into the nearby sink.

Haphazardly, the cleft of her buttocks pushed the bowl of saturated bacon aside to teeter on the other side of the counter. Orange juice splashed in its glass pitcher, threatening to spill. Its sturdy base held steadfast instead casting a cloud of citrus aroma to their forbidden gourmet soiree.

As dependable as a rotary timer, Anita’s lust manifested, unleashing as she pinched his nipples, plying them here and there. Her recipient gasped in a cry of gratitude with a dash of pain.

Sampling her kiss, her taste became rich and creamy like the finest of imported chocolates. He descended down her cheeks onto the neck, suckling her fragrant flesh like creamy soufflé. Anita sighed, tossing her head back, flour scattering recklessly. Her head rapped against the cupboard, deterring their recipe little.

While mixing and twirling his tongue in flavorful spirals down her chest, Rick molded and shaped her simmering breasts. He kneaded with the passion of a baker. The true masterpiece was the endorphin fueled vinaigrette bursting and drizzling down her veins.

The height of his stature proved magnificently tasty against the counter, as his manly spatula sizzled against her red hot skillet. Still he teased and provoked her desirous pallet, never getting his full feeding. Rick churned her hunger, beckoning the primal appetite within her.

While she gestured to lock ankles behind her back, confining her to frost her every sweetened craving, he broke free suddenly. Shuffling backwards, he taunted her further until his buttocks flattened against the cool refrigerator. He flinched, and swooshed open the door in one graceful bound, and found within his grasp one squeezable bottle of chocolate sauce. Eyes bulged in awe, as she opened her mouth in defense. Just as she parted her lips, Rick tore her silken lingerie free of her torso and dripped thick streams of dark decadence down her collarbone, raining down her ripened breasts.

At first she’d shuddered and squirmed, then her awakened flesh absorbed every gooey drop of the dark syrup. Her nipples peered through streaks of chocolate, making a mammary sundae garnished with cherry nipples of delicacy.

Rick nibbled and provoked the succulent centers. Turning rabid with arousal, her chin shivered as she smiled her captivating smile. Urgently, she yanked his head free of her candy bosom. Anita kissed the chocolate from his lips, savoring its sweet taste.

As spontaneous of a maneuver as the entire previous spectacle, she placed her dainty toes and ball of her pedicured foot upon his chest. Playfully, she shoved him from the counter, cackling all the way. Now it was the hostess’s turn to dive for the fridge.

Bursting the seal free with a whoosh, she laughed deliriously. Rick awaited no further horseplay as he clutched her haunches, smacking his utensil between her sweet buns.

Anita yelped in mixture of shock and delight. Never to be shown up, she spun around with a jar of gourmet blueberry jam. Their enamored struggle almost caused her to release the jelly.

She giggled, fumbling while recovering her grip. Upon her breasts, Rick smeared the syrupy texture. The goop created a smorgasbord of passionate offerings between his palms and her flattened gazongas.

Anita could not help but allow a sampling of her goods. No one bubbled her batter quite like her ‘studly’ new neighbor Rick. Suddenly her giblets were sweetened to taste with a stream of warm elixir. Even the thought of him stirring at her saucepan threatened to boil over her sphincter, and drove her heart in a five alarm blaze.

Just for a moment or two she wished to savor the sensation. The feel of his gruff hands and deep voice bellowing into her ear, provoked her submission. Somehow she’d lost all control of her senses and self preservation to this man; this all consuming beast.

While plotting her next move, Anita was overthrown once again. His brute strength was no match for her vulnerable comedy induced state. Behind her knees, he swung his forearm like a formidable scythe reaping the fruits of his harvest by cradling her nimble body and laying her down onto the table. Unable to proceed any further, Rick halted in his tracks as she sat upright, lathering his dip stick with thick blueberry jelly. He squirmed at first, the cool feel of gelatin upon his genitals. The sensation graduated to tingling as he swiveled his hips in round even succession.

Anita topped off her naughty frosting with a squeeze of whipped cream upon his knob. Voila. A man sized canola fit for a queen. She sneered provocatively up at him and parted her lips wide.