This week, I went on vacation to Disney World with my family. Unlike countless family vacations in the past, my dad didn’t come with us on this trip.

This time, my second mom came with us.

For the first time in her life, my MTF trans-parent was able to live as a woman, full-time, with the full acceptance of her family.

For the first time, Snow White greeted her as Princess instead of Prince.

For the first time, she could openly wear a skirt and pretty sandals to dinner with us.

For the first time, Goofy tried to bow to her instead of offering her a fist-bump.

For the first time, she could freely use the ladies’ restroom without fear of someone freaking out.

For the first time, she could go to the pool in a pretty skirted swimsuit instead of trunks or a Speedo.

For the first time, people at the park addressed us as “ladies” instead of “ladies and gentleman” and called her “Ma’am.”

For the first time, they offered her Minnie ears instead of Mickey ears.

For the first time, she could wear jewelry openly every day.

For the first time, she could gush over the pretty purses in the Japanese Pavilion at Epcot with us.

For the first time, she could just… be a girl. Without fear, she could just be herself, a woman spending a fun vacation with her family. A girl having fun in Disney World. Not a girl trying to hide the fact that she had a beard and a penis and chest hair, just… a girl.

It has meant so much to her to have this time. The strain of waiting to present fully and permanently as a woman, for the emotional comfort of her family, has been huge. Some days she got to the point of almost not caring what the world thought and going all out. Not being able to just be a girl has been very, very hard.

As for the rest of us, it has been hardest on my mother. Except for the initial shock, it was almost a non-event for me. “Oh, ok. Cool. What can I do to help?” Has been the gist of my response. My sister has been having some trouble with the constant switching back and forth between Mama Marie* and Daddy, and implied for months, very strongly, that she wanted Mama Marie to just stay Daddy. She’s dealt with our parent just being Mama Marie full time much better, because the strain of remembering what to call her in front of whom is gone.

Mom has been having a tough time of it, but she, too, is finding it easier now that Mama Marie isn’t trying to present as both Mama and Dad… at the same time. We all felt a little awkward when she was dressing and acting as Dad, but wearing a piece of jewelry, or lipstick, or one other Mama Marie bit. It’s just more comfortable when she’s all Mama Marie, and she’s obviously more comfortable and happy.

I’m not sure what will happen when we go home. We’d planned on talking to some of our friends individually to let them know about Mama Marie, giving them some time to get used to the idea and be firmly on our side by the time Dad became Mama Marie for good. We’d planned on testing the waters carefully, finding out where we would and would not be accepted – workplace, church, schools, neighborhood.

After this week of freedom, I don’t know what will happen. I don’t know if my trans-parent will be able to force herself to continue being Dad. I don’t know if she’ll be able to go back to living the lie. I don’t know if she’ll be able to live as if she didn’t go home and put on a blouse and skirt and makeup for the evening.

I don’t know how much time we have before she can’t take it anymore and starts living the truth full-time, leaving us to mend the fences and bridges she may have to crack in the process. But if that is what she needs, then hand me the mortar and invest in building supplies companies, because that’s what family’s for – to make sure life goes on through a transition, to support come hell or high water.

*Names have been changed