I hate shopping for bras. I absolutely adore my boobs, but gals this big need support. Now, supportive bras for larger ladies aren’t too hard to find, if you’re willing to shop around. The problem is that American bra makers seem to be convinced that anyone with large breasts is large overall. The only slim girls with large boobs must have had implants, and of course everyone knows implants don’t need support. It’s rare to find a large cup-size bra under a 38” band size. Then, when you do, they’re usually just scaled up versions of smaller bras. News flash, but D+ breasts need completely different support from Bs and Cs.

I’m not a large lady. Yes, I have big boobs, but otherwise I’m a smaller girl; delicately built, even. At 40”-30”-40”, there’s no way I can use a 38” band bra! To be honest, when was the last time you saw a 32F bra in stores? On the rare occasions when you somehow, miraculously manage to find a small band size, large cup size bra, they cover half the torso and look like parachutes. I have no desire to use my bras to jump out of planes, thank you very much. I’d prefer my bras to at least look just boring, not these extremes of frumpy. Heck, I’d like to have just one pretty bra that actually fits, and gives me support.

Such bras do exist, but if you live in the US, you’re mostly restricted to imported bras and a very, very few American companies. While some American companies make bras that appear to fit the bill, most have very little support. In Europe, they believe that ladies can be slender, and still have big boobs. Unfortunately for those of us on tight budgets, good bras in this size range are expensive. To be bluntly honest, they’re a specialty item. You’re going to have to pay for the fact that they can’t sell as many of them as they can the “normal” sizes, and you’re going to have to pay for the reality that they had to completely redesign the bra to give our large breasts the support they need. On sale, from a reputable retailer, I’ve been lucky to find very basic bras for about $45 ($30-$35 online). Don’t even get me started on off-sale prices, and anything beyond basic bras. My wallet may begin to weep.

To add insult to injury, you must then find said bras. They aren’t too difficult to find over the internet, but for a non-standard size gal, ordering bras over the internet without having tried them on is like playing Russian Roulette… with Me, Myself, and I. To get a good fit, most women with this particular set of sizing problems need to try on a whole slew of styles and sizes and brands before they find those that really work for her. This is, of course, easier to do in a brick-and-mortar store than it is over the internet. Unfortunately, there aren’t many stores that carry good small band size/large cup size bras. It’s easier to find them in metropolitan areas, but they are still few and far between.

My little sister has recently graduated from training bras into real bras. At a fairly normal 32B, she has endless options. She has her choice of colors, patterns, designs, prints. She had her choice of no padding, light padding, super push-up. She has her choice of bra styles and fabrics, or frills and matching sets, and she’ll never have to pay over $20 for a comfortable, adequately supportive, attractive bra if she shops the sales. I’ll admit, as much as I love my sister, and as much as I love seeing her happy, I go green with envy when I have to go with her for bra shopping runs. I get jealous when my 34C cousin gushes about the gorgeous lingerie she got for her wedding night at a steal of a price. I get jealous when my mother can walk into a store and buy a bra off the rack.

And I see red when someone asks “Why don’t you just go down a cup size and up a band size?”

I’ve been surviving on this trick for several years. When you’re in the C-D range, it’s a manageable fix. A DD trying to pull this one is pushing it. Beyond that point, though, it’s often more pain and trouble than it’s worth. My breasts ache from lack of support. I get stabbed in the sides of my rib cage because my overflowing breasts jab the underwires into me. I get a quadraboob effect if the ladies are settled nicely against the bottom of the cup, or I squish out of the bottom and sides if I smooth out the silhouette up top. This whole situation can range from uncomfortable to rather painful.

On top of all the discomfort, to be honest, breasts just don’t look their best when the bra doesn’t fit right. They’re smooshed flat, they look saggy, they bulge, they crease, and if you try to move they bounce around like a troop of acrobats on meth. While you might like to watch the last one, it’s rather painful and embarrassing.

Having boobs of any size should be a joy – they should be fun, they should be comfortable, they should make you feel sexy. You shouldn’t have to go dread bra shopping because it makes you feel fat, saggy, abnormal, and unattractive. Boobs are beautiful!