Did you ever try to write with your non-dominant hand? When I have, it looks like I handed the pen over to a three year old. Or when you first learned to slow dance? Whether you were learning to lead or follow, someone’s toes were going to get stepped on in the process. Or even better, how about when you first learned to drive? All the things you had to coordinate to get that skill down seemed impossible at first.

Well that’s what it felt like the first time I attempted pegging. And attempt is the perfect word for that first time, because it was not all that successful. But I did get a lot of laughs out of it and learned a few lessons through the experience.

First let me say, that I never in a million years would have thought pegging was something I would have tried. I had absolutely no interest in being in the driver’s seat, so to speak. I am extremely happy and content with being a woman, and everything that goes with that role, including being on the getting end of sex. But it seemed my husband had other ideas. Basically he wanted to finding out what it would be like to get fucked. So, as with any semi-reasonable request of his, I decided to give it a try.

Funny thing is while researching the topic, I read many posts and reviews by women saying how hot they felt they looked donning a harness with a dildo jutting out of their pelvises. That wouldn’t exactly be my description of how I thought I looked. I felt silly with that thing on and embarrassed to even walk out of the bathroom. But I finally did. And even though I didn’t think I looked so hot, my husband did. The dildo that I was wearing is L-shaped and is meant to please both the giver and receiver. Which in hindsight was a good choice, because I don’t think I would have even tried this a second time if I hadn’t received some pleasure from being the giver. What can I say, I’m a bit selfish that way.

Before we even started, I didn’t think much about the dynamics of being on the giving end. It never even dawned on me that it might be difficult and extremely different. I’m not a passive lover by any means. And I spend a good amount of time on top, and in charge of the rhythms, angles, and tempos of our movements. So it only made sense to me that this would be similar. I figured it would just be like trying a new position. Boy was I wrong! There is something completely different about being in the driver seat sexually. And I mean literally “in the driver’s seat!”

At first we tried doggy style, which didn’t go very well. I’m not used to being up on my knees, legs together, thrusting forward. Not to mention, the weight of my husband thrusting back just kept knocking me off balance, to the point that we had to stop or I was going to be flying off the bed backwards. And let me say, being the “thruster” is very difficult if you’re not used to it. The types of movements it required were completely foreign to me, and felt unnatural, like writing with my left hand. And I’m not sure if it’s just because I’m not used to it, or if it actually is harder than what I normally have to do, but I found it much more fatiguing.

Next we tried a semi-missionary position with my husband on the bottom, his rear booted up by the Liberator Wedge, and me on top. Wow! His legs are heavy! I had no idea. But then again, he is much larger and weighs a lot more than I do. One thing that helped me to feel a little better about the fact that I wasn’t doing such a great job about assuming his role, was the fact that he wasn’t doing such a hot job of assuming mine. He really can’t get his legs up very high or very far apart, and he definitely can’t keep them there without help. Even at 50, I can still put my knees up over my shoulders and keep them there the whole time with little to no help from him. Anyway, this position did work a bit better. But I did have to tell him to stay still, so I wouldn’t be knocked over by his enthusiasm. Finally we were able to get a rhythm going and we were both starting to really enjoy it. That’s when things once again went awry.

I was starting to really enjoy how my end of the dildo was hitting my clit and G-spot, which at first only made me move faster and harder. But that also threw off my rhythm, which in turn threw off the momentum. After several of these little stops and starts I finally got a good solid rhythm going and began to have an orgasm. Actually we were both starting to orgasm. That was…..until I stopped. You see, when I’m having an orgasm, I stop all movement and my husband is the one who continues on, while I’m busy screaming and moaning and basically just being in the moment. It never really dawned on me not to stop. But this time it was my job to be the one continuing on. Though I didn’t know how to do that, it just wasn’t natural for me to do that. Also, there was a bit of a problem with the double ended dildo during orgasm. It seems that my orgasm pushed my end of the dildo out of me. That kind of ended up killing the whole session. But what can I say, I couldn’t help it that my dick fell off. At least that’s not something men have to contend with, theirs is permanently attached.

Since then we have tried pegging a couple more times, and we will do it again. It has gotten better for both of us each time we try it. These experiences have taught me a lot though. For the first time in our sex life, I’ve learned what it’s like to truly be on the giving end. I have a whole new empathy for what my husband does during sex. And I have to admit it’s really not easy. And even though this isn’t something that I wanted to try in the first place, I now find myself wanting to take the driver’s seat occasionally. I’m kind of digging the control. Even though I’ve always had a lot of control sexually, this is different. There’s something very empowering and intimate about entering another person’s most vulnerable places, both emotionally and physically. And I can really get off on that.

Yes, it’s getting better, and I’m enjoying it more each time we do it. I finally learned how to not stop in the midst of an orgasm. Unfortunately my dick still falls off. But now I just put it back in and get back to business.

Written by newme21 (LP)
December 29, 2009