Letter to a Plus-Sized Woman
Dear Lady, We wanted to write and share our thoughts with you, because as your wardrobe, your looks are a reflection on us.
read moreRedhead Rumors
There are tons of names for redheads; some mild, some wild! But what has given redhead women this surrounding of fame?
read more(Beauty) Seeing Beyond the Flaws
I am always amazed when my husband says he thinks I'm beautiful. I look at my body and he certainly can't be seeing the same thing I see.
read moreI Used to be a Stripper, and Now I’m a Mom
I was 20 years old and working in a cubicle, when I got a new cube neighbor. Her name? Dejah. It didn’t take me long to learn she was a stripper. And it took even less time for me to get intrigued, and lose interest in being trapped in a cubicle all day. So, my 20 year old body, with perky breasts, went on stage. I remember my...
read moreLoving My Hot Pink Bush
Eden Café recently ran a great piece about feminism and the problem with things like body policing . I loved this piece because it’s a subject I think and write about a lot. I am a queer-identified feminist, but I often struggle with feeling queer enough, or being told my lifestyle choices aren’t in line with someone’s...
read moreI Feel Pretty … Oh, So Pretty!
You see it in commercials for feminine products of all shapes and sizes. A woman with long flowing hair and clothes--usually a twirly skirt--and limbs spin under godrays on some sort of wall.
read moreTake a Look in the Mirror
If you asked me to strip naked in front of a body-length mirror, I’d protest like a two-year-old at first. I hate mirrors; the less often I have to look at myself in one, the better. If you somehow managed to coax me into stripping naked and pointing out everything I liked about my body, I would say this: How soft my skin is, even...
read moreMirror, Mirror on the Wall…
I Do Not Like What I See at All So what is your body image? Is it positive or negative? If you answered negative, you are not alone. Thousands of women, not just teens, in the United States alone feel that their body does not meet today’s certain social and cultural ideals of beauty. And why shouldn’t we feel this way? As women,...
read moreObesity and Trauma
“Sexual abuse might play a role in the development of obesity in young black women. Current estimates indicate that about 1 in 4 young women have experienced physical or verbal abuse in dating situations, with black and other minority women suffering the highest risk. “If you look at recurring patterns in teenagers, many...
read moreWe’ve Lost Our Way
There was a time in the American culture when women like Marilyn Monroe, Jayne Mansfield, Rita Hayworth, and Lana Turner were the epitome of what a sex symbol was. They were the bombshells and the goddesses that we ogled from near and far, and there wasn’t a man in the country who didn’t have a pinup of them somewhere in...
read moreThe Perpetual Single Ugly One
My body is weird. I don’t particularly like looking at it in the mirror, just because it gives me the creeps. It has these weird bends and bobbles. Faded stretch marks from years of gaining and losing weight, and scars from an operation I had four months back. Not to forget the massive birthmark on my right leg, that, if you...
read moreTop Three Ways to Be Sexy: Embracing Your Inner Porn Star
Last week I spoke at a blog conference about what I learned in my first year of blogging. I managed to get through the event without any wardrobe malfunctions or having any food thrown in my general direction; I guess you could say I was kind of amazing. Afterwards, a handful of attendees were kind enough to come up and slather me...
read moreConfidence in the Bedroom
I’ve been fielding some questions related to sexual confidence lately, mainly body image. Not necessarily because of the article I wrote for Eden Cafe on my personal body image, but because these people trusted me to be honest with them. Maybe someone else needs to hear it too, so I wanted to say it here for the masses. And this...
read moreFilling the Hole
It wasn’t all that long ago that this is exactly what I saw when I looked in the mirror. I was hyper sensitive to every single perceived flaw I had. I had worked so hard to lose the extra weight I’d carried for so long. Surely my life would be different if I was thinner. As the weight came off, my body changed a lot. The problem...
read moreJust what is “beautiful” anyhow?
Well, I usually have trouble figuring out how to start this topic off. Either in conversation or in debate, or even in arguments which got way out of hand, (Seriously, I just asked what you were thinking about for dinner!) it’s always really easy for it to get depressing while talking about body image. In today’s world,...
read moreA Fluctuation
I’ve been attempting to write a post on body image for weeks, possibly over a month. Other posts just seemed to have flowed out until I hit this topic. It stalled me. Being the stubborn person that I am, I can’t just pick a new topic and forget this one. So, I’ve been sitting here trying to get this post out. Then it hit me, I...
read moreThe Perils of Being a Skinny Girl
I’m sure we’ll all familiar with the weight obsession in our society today. Watch TV, surf the web, read magazines, or go to the store and you’ll come across a million ads telling you how to lose weight, and be sexy. Every health and fitness website is dedicated to those trying to lose weight. EdenCafe is full of articles...
read moreThe Gift (or Curse?) of Hips: My Weight Struggles
When I was younger, and I assure you that I say that with a sense of irony because my younger days aren’t that far in the past, I remember when things weren’t so black and white in our culture, when beauty wasn’t about being shockingly thin and having numerous plastic surgeries to achieve their ideal of perfection. I do assume...
read moreThe Ugly Girls Manifesto
(Or how I learned to ignore the cultural idea of beauty and find my own) As a child, I was only told what really matters is how you look on the inside. Well I hate to say this, but it’s a load of shit. This is a great idealism, but when you get down to reality it is just not true. We have created a cultural ideal beauty that none...
read moreLife and Observations of a Chunky Girl
I’m not a skinny chick. But I’m also not the fattest chick I’ve ever seen. I’m not that lady in Wal-Mart, on the scooter with my belly hanging out of my muu-muu. However, my inner skinny chick is wanting some attention. More on that in a few minutes. I’ve always been a chunky girl. Always. I came into this world over the...
read morePlus-Sized Girl on Stage
I have never been a thin woman. I could never see myself in a size 2 dress, ever. Even a size 7 would make me feel that I was way too thin. Right now, I’m a size 13 and I stand 4’11″. I have dropped a dress size from starting my training for the 2012- 3 Day; walking 60 miles in three days to raise money for breast...
read moreBody Image: How My Family Tried to Rule My Body
I’ve always wanted to have kids young, I felt that by having them at a younger age I would be able to easily keep up with them and be a hip, fun mom. I got my wish now at 24, with an almost 3 year old little girl, I just last month had my son. I had always heard the complaints women had about getting pregnant then having trouble...
read moreBody Image: Not Just About Personal Opinion
What do you see when you look in the mirror? Is the person who looks back at you happy? Sad? Are there changes that you would make? Would you give yourself a nose job? Face lift, tummy tuck, and gastric bypass? Or are you one of the few who are completely happy with how you look? I will be the first to admit I am not always happy...
read moreI’m cool with being fat.
I rarely talk about body image. My own personal body image is something I’ve struggled with for a long, long time. Even when I was a size 12 (which is the size I look best at) with awesome tits and a spectacular ass and legs that went on for miles all toned and tanned, I still thought I was fat and gross. I’d starve...
read moreWoman Without a Country
I lie next to her, fighting with my oversized t-shirt to get comfortable and wonder just what she sees in me. I turn my thoughts to my laptop and stare at a blinking cursor and silently scream… “What do you want from me?” And then my daughter skips down the stairs and peeks her head into my room and asks what am I doing...
read moreThe Body Beautiful and BDSM
I use one of the many BDSM social sites to find events and keep track of my far flung friends. I also use it to talk to new people in my local area. We were all new to the lifestyle once, and I enjoy reaching out to answer questions or reassurance. The thing I hear the most is that a lot of women, and men, are afraid to come out...
read moreWhat Can I Say? I Love My Body!
I’m what the world calls Full Figured. I’m not extremely obese, and I don’t have any health issues. I’m about a size 16/18. Basically I’m comparable to the girls you would see in the “plus size” catalogs, but some people (my grandmother especially) wish I would lose some weight. Here’s the thing though, I like my...
read moreWotW: BBW
BBW is an acronym that means Big Beautiful Woman/Women and was first coined in 1979 by the creator of BBW Magazine, Carole Shaw. The word exploded onto the scene, and now women that haven’t even heard of the magazine use the term to describe themselves. The term is very subjective as to it’s meaning, and has no defined upper...
read moreEmbrace Your Imperfections
When you look in the mirror, what do you see? Do you see your bulging belly fat, or do you see small your uneven breasts? Does the size of your penis bother you? Maybe you are lacking large muscles like other guys have. We all have some things about our bodies that are imperfect. Does your self-body image have you missing out on...
read moreAm I Too Big or Too Small?
Average. That’s the only way I can think to call myself since my mid-teens. Some consider me a big girl, and some people call me tiny. There seems to be no set label for my body type. I never know how to classify myself, and have always felt like I needed to. I have always seemed to have some kind of body insecurity that I...
read moreWalls
I’ve always been a little shy, a little introverted. During school I kept mostly to myself and allowed very few people see the real me. Or, what I thought was the real me at the time. Over the years almost all of these friends have disappeared. Some because we fought and walked away, others because we grew apart. I was never one...
read moreIt’s not the fat I hate.
M and I talk about the past a lot. Mostly our past together, and mostly the good times. We’ve been through some really rough patches, and we’re not stupid enough to pretend we don’t remember them. They are part of what has made our relationship so strong. We just don’t see the point in rehashing things that...
read moreStarved for Love
Many years ago, it was the pleasantly plump that were considered beautiful because it meant that they had money to afford food. Those who have the money, those that are in power, are beautiful. But I grew up in a time where being skinny was beautiful. Media shows off their ideals in skinny, tall models with legs that never seem...
read moreSteph on Sex Positivity
I recently had a conversation with a friend about my complete and utter disdain for my naked body. Especially if it’s getting naked in front of someone else. Especially if that person has never seen me naked before. I’m a big girl. I have been all my life. Rubenesque. Voluptuous. Curvy. Fat. I’ve heard and said...
read moreBody Acceptance and the Tummy Monster
I’ve always been an extremely thin girl. Genetics gave me a tall frame and a metabolism that worked faster than one of Santa’s elves on crack. Most girls would have killed to have a heroin-chic body like mine, but in high school, I hated it. I felt lanky and uncoordinated. I would have given anything to look like the other...
read moreSubmission Meets Body Image
I consider myself a ‘bigger girl’. Many have said, “No, no- you’re not THAT big! Definitely not considered a BBW.” However, when I consider my weight to my height, and my dress size, I’m big enough. If I’m not big enough to be considered a BBW, then I’m just ‘short and fat’ – and well, that’s no...
read moreI Want To Be Sexy Again
I want to be sexy again. I want it, I desire it, I need it, I yearn for it. Every day as I go about my business, cleaning, working, cooking, showering, it’s forever in the back of my mind. How do I become sexy again? Was I ever really sexy before? Does it have to do with my body? Of course that’s part of it. I know I...
read moreEver Since I Can Remember
Ever since I can remember I’ve been a “big girl.” I’ve been “big boned” or “plus sized” or “well padded.” I’ve actually been told so many times that I realized I’ve come to believe it lately; that I will never, ever be skinny. That I will never have a flat stomach. That I will never be able to shop...
read moreLovin’ Myself
I am making an odyssey into the murky waters of different toy materials. I am excited and I have to admit to a little bit of trepidation. This is something that in my household was sneered at, only oversexed sluts had ‘sex toys’. Sometimes I worry about whether I’ll have the time to use all these toys! Will my...
read moreGaining Confidence
Lately I have been noticing a lot of posts regarding body image issues. I wanted to say that I have had my fair share of body image issues as well. I’m petite, I am 5 feet tall and I now weigh 118 pounds. Doesn’t sound like much right? This goes to show you that everyone suffers from body image issues no matter what...
read moreFeeling Sexy
So this morning I was sitting at my kitchen table and I realized that it’s been a very, very long time since I’ve really felt sexy. I suppose I could blame it on stress, the move, work problems, any number of things. But the truth is that we all must take care of ourselves. For each of us I’m sure...
read moreMy Big Fat Sex Life
Alright, so I’m a big girl. 250 pounds. No big deal. I’ve kind of always been this way, chubby for as long as I can remember. My first pair of Calvin Klein jeans in eighth grade were a size 16, and by the time I left highschool I was another size bigger, shopping exclusively at plus-sized stores and being ridiculed...
read moreYoung Folks Hurt Too
I’ve got a lot of friends between the ages of 20 and 25 that have serious chronic back pain. I myself at 22 have a lot of pain in not quite my hip, not quite my lower back, but somewhere in between. I’ve been told it’s my sciatic nerve. Sometimes that spot feels like a joint that needs to pop, and it does, and it...
read morePart Time Transsexual
Part-time Transsexual oliverHyde I have body image issues, but they’re not what you might think. I am genderqueer, and a very gender-fluid genderqueer at that. There are some days where I feel like a girl, some days where I feel like a boy, and some days where I feel in between. The days where I feel like a girl kind of rock...
read moreSuck it Up, Buttercup
I stopped caring about my body right about the same time I became sexually active. For me, the two were weirdly linked when I was younger. You see, I was pretty much always interested in sex, so when I was bigger than all the other girls in fifth and sixth grade that was my biggest worry. I know, I was a weird kid. But when I...
read moreFat High School Girl
I think being a fat girl growing up really changed how my high school years went. I know for sure that it changed how all of my relationships went. Now that I’ve been in a stable relationship for a couple years and that my self-esteem has leveled out, I look back on what I did in my teenage years with a slight twinge of...
read moreMake up your Minds!
Body image is something that in this day and time is on every young girls mind. From the time you are a young child you are subjected to things that I believe subconsciously scream at you to be skinny. For example, one of the first toys you probably received when you were 3 or so was probably BARBIE. Hello unrealistic body...
read moreHe Loves My Body, Shouldn’t I?
Body image has always been an issue for me, for most of my life. I was a small, thin child, but from 6th grade through 10th grade, I was considered “chubby”. Somehow between 10th and 11th grade, I lost about 50 pounds and was thin for the start of my junior year. For once, I felt beautiful and healthy. I felt like I...
read moreThe Return Of My Image
Body image is such a hard topic for me. For most of my life I have avoided looking at myself in the mirror because I have never recognized the person I see. To say my image of myself doesn’t match reality would be an understatement. Buying clothes is torture for me not because I hate the way I look but because when I look in...
read moreConfessions of a Size 8 Mom with Poor Body Image
I was a size 8 when I graduated high school. You see, my boyfriend dumped me a week before my graduation, and I got really depressed. According to my mom, I got really thin. I don’t remember looking very thin because I wanted to be skinnier so maybe I could win him back. I started to paint my nails crazy colors – like blue...
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