BDSM is a part of me. Yes, most of the activities that I partake in only happen in certain instances and at certain times, but for the most part BDSM is an essential part of me. I have known from a very early age that I was different than the other kids. I was five years old, watching Aladdin, and finding myself get those little butterflies when Jafar took over and made Jasmine his slave. I couldn’t explain it then, being so young, and found that trend with any movie that portrayed servitude or slavery ideals. When I turned 17 I came to the realization that people practice slavery and such in real life. I was a non believer and thought my friend who brought this to my attention to be insane. He then introduced me to a personals site that is specifically for dominant and submissive types, as well as those who enjoy playing on both sides of the fence, to chat, meet, and develop relationships. This was the beginning of my journey to who I am today.
First involving me with people who were in the BDSM lifestyle was scary and dangerous. I really did meet some less than safe people. I almost got myself killed twice and it was extremely frightening. Those experiences opened my eyes to how people can be and just how dangerous some people are. Unfortunately, for me, that fear kept me from exploring the local community scene for a quite a long time until I moved home to New Orleans. When I moved home I decided to take a chance and get involved with the local community called NOBLE. I went to a social gathering and was extremely nervous. Before I knew it I was at my first party and building a reputation of my own.
Since becoming involved with the local community, I have participated in several demonstrations, expanded my horizons and limits, and have made many new connections here in the city and abroad. BDSM is very much a part of me because it I indentify with it so strongly. While I do not require being beaten on the regular basis or being kept in a 24/7 slavery type relationship, I do desire and crave the power exchange of a relationship. I want to bend and yield to my partner and I often find myself doing so in my relationships, even vanilla ones. In the past year I have gone from being the student exclusively to being a teacher as well as a student.
BDSM is a part of me also because I enjoy teaching people who are curious or may be afraid of this lifestyle that it is actually not so scary. Yes, a lot of play is taboo to a lot of people, but BDSM does not have to be all kicking, punching, bleeding, and other such things. BDSM can be as simple as pulling your partner’s hair in the bedroom or giving a light spanking while having sex. It doesn’t have to involve whips and chains. It really only takes an imagination and your hands to create a scene that is ideal for you.
I am a lifestyle switch. I enjoy both being on top and being on bottom. I am an educator, a student, and a confident woman in what I do and who I am. BDSM has helped me to build my self confidence and my self-perception. It has made me stronger and more in tune with me, my desires, and my wants. It is a defining characteristic of me that I love, enjoy, and embrace on the daily and regular basis.