Recently there was a great article by Sarahbear on Eden Café that struck a certain chord with me. She has a very different perspective of a situation that is close to me and I felt compelled to share my own perspective on these situations.
I think the most common perspective when it comes to cheating that the “other woman” is at fault. She’s a seductress. She’s deceiving. She’s void of caring for anyone’s feelings but hers. Sound about right? I’ll have to say I used to fall into that line of thinking as well, maybe not to the extreme I’ve mentioned here, but more or less the basic idea. Since then I’ve had some experiences that have made me think otherwise that I’d like to share.
I met my current partner in the summer of 2007 during college orientation. We ended up talking all day and about halfway through the day we walked by a woman in a cute green dress who was quickly introduced as his wife. I said hello and then we went on our way to register me for classes, etc. We got along so well that the whole way home I talked to my mom about him and how great he was. When I got there my freshman year of college in the fall he became not only my advisor, but my counselor and friend. If I felt depressed, anxious, upset, anything at all – I’d send him an email because I was honestly too shy to go see him in his office.
At the end of my freshman year when we went out to lunch he told me he was attracted to me and he kissed me. I was unsure what I should be thinking. The next day I went home for the summer. The rest of the weeks of that summer were spent talking to him and talking to myself asking what I wanted to do and what I should do. I now realize in my attempt to do the “right” thing, I was callous towards him and also untrue to my own feelings. I was too concerned about what society says I should do, say, think.
The fall of 2008 I came back to school and we acted like nothing had ever happened. That fall I had class with his wife (who I later found out knew about the event in the earlier months), which I maybe should have dropped out of, but I refused to let her dictate my academic success and knew I was stronger than that. There was no reason I couldn’t face her. So, what ended up happening? She tried to befriend me, but it was never an honest attempt. She simply wanted to guilt me into not associating with her husband, which is one of the most manipulative things I have experienced. Even though my therapist was telling me she was a fraud and my gut instinct told me that as well, I still met with her almost daily to get coffee and talk. I couldn’t bring myself to tell her I wanted nothing to do with her as I figured, “What has she done to me? Nothing.” I thought maybe she honestly just needed someone to talk to, and if she chose me then I should be honored and listen as well as I could. It was all well and fine until she started talking about their relationship and trying to make him into some kind of monster that I knew he wasn’t. She almost had me believe it. I still thank my therapist for helping me realize she was only trying to manipulate me. I ended up saying I wasn’t pursuing him – which was true, I wasn’t – even though she said a thousand times, “When I find the strength to leave him, you can have him. I don’t care.” Which I think was said precisely to get me to feel guilty as it obviously wasn’t true. The whole time resulted in hours speaking to my very understanding roommate about what was happening and coming up with no solutions.
His wife ended up saying eventually that we couldn’t speak – which would mean I would have to halt my independent study with him. He and I spoke that day and ended up emailing in order to communicate. Two days later she moved out for good after he told her he no longer loved her. Where was I during all of this? Sitting in my room, looking at the wall confused as a person could be. Did I ever ask him to leave her? No. That was a decision he made on his own that I have no part of. After her things were out of the house I moved in.
What happened afterwards is a series of harassment every single day, coming into the house while we were sleeping, vandalizing our property, putting up degrading flyers around my campus (only to be caught by security), calling at ridiculously late hours demanding to talk and eventually leaving. Did I deserve that simply because I fell in love with the “wrong” person? Am I somehow less compassionate when I tried for months after she left to say nothing bad about her? Am I really the seductress bitch that many people paint the “other woman” to be? No. I am not.
Our one year anniversary is coming up in February and we couldn’t be happier despite the hardships we’ve had to endure together. Sure, there have been little fights, disagreements, him annoying me, me annoying him, but we’re happy. And that is what matters in the end.
I am not a monster. I am not void of compassion and empathy. I am not selfish and inconsiderate. I’m simply a person living life. I hope that my story has given at least a few people a different perspective on an occurrence in which the “other woman” is so often made out to be something she is not.

I’ve already written about how important sexual health is to me, but another thing that is an important part of my life is my physical health and the health of the environment and animals. When I first realized this a few years ago I wondered what path I should take. Should I eat some grass-fed beef hoping it lived a good life? Should I eat only fish and buy into the sustainable fish marketing? After much thinking I came to the only conclusion that made sense – I had to go vegan.
While most people know what a vegan is, I’ll go ahead and clear it up. Vegans do not eat any animal product or any animal byproduct, nor do they use these products for other purposes. Whey powder in your hot chocolate mix? Nope. Gelatin in your nail polish remover? Not for me. Egg albumen in your taffy? No thanks. You get the point. If it comes from an animal, vegans don’t use it.
At this point in my life I was still living in a small town (around 16,000 people) and I didn’t know that many vegans. Fortunately, my friend Chris and I decided to go vegan together so we would at least have a support system. I’ll admit, I had no clue what to eat at first and neither did he. I guess we both bought into the stereotype that vegans only eat celery sticks and hummus, so we didn’t branch out much. But, after a while I started to realize vegan food can be even more interesting than the food I was eating before. It not only improved my physical health quickly, but it improved my knowledge in the kitchen. I learned to cook with ingredients I had never touched before like agar powder, arrowroot, hemp milk, carob chips, seitan, and even some vegetables like celery root, kale, porcini mushrooms and a ton more. Cooking became an experience I looked forward to instead of something that had to be done.
In between cooking and figuring out what to do with new ingredients at the farmer’s market, I began looking into ethical reasons to go vegan. In the U.S., the Standard American Diet (SAD) is based around animal products such as meat, eggs, cheese, etc. But are people really aware about what eating a piece of pork implies? Let’s put aside the issue of factory farms for a minute, as those are a topic unto themselves, and imagine that all meat comes from a smaller farm. The main question I asked myself was this – Even if the animal had an okay life and was fed well, does that give me a right to kill it when I have no need? Does that make it right? And I came to the conclusion that no, it doesn’t make it right. Which is why I actively protest against the “happy meat” fad that is going around right now. It doesn’t matter if your meat was fed grain or not, in the end that animal is still murdered. As a society, the United States no longer has a need to consume these products. We aren’t nomadic people hunting for our next meal. There is no excuse.
My life after going vegan has been nothing but great. My current partner even went vegan a few months ago after he listened to what I was saying and realized that it is healthier. In conclusion, if you have brushed off veganism in the past, I really urge you to give it a shot. Go to a vegan restaurant and see how great the food can be. Or just get a great cookbook and have at it! Even eating vegan a couple times a week will be better for you and also cost less than meat and cheese laden foods.
Saraid recommends:
Veganomicon by Isa Chandra Moskowitz
Vegan Cupcakes Take Over The World by Isa Chandra Moskowitz and Terry Romero
Mediterranean Vegan Kitchen by Donna Klein
Vegan with a Vengeance by Isa Chandra Moskowitz

I honestly never thought I would fall into the trap of having eyes too big for my ass, but yes, it’s finally come upon us. I no longer know the limits of my own ass. I’ve been looking around a lot on EF lately trying to figure out what to get with the holiday discount code. After not too much thought I figured out I need at least one more plug since my plug arsenal is small and rather pathetic. So I figure, why not go with the Tristan? It’s popular, it’s pretty, it’s silicone – enough said. But then for some reason I felt compelled to get more and so I waltz myself onto Twitter begin asking people what they think I should get. Despite many of my blogger friends telling me things like, “The njoy Pure Plug Large is way bigger in person” and that the Tristan II is “huge as fuck,” I still felt compelled to buy one for future use.

Then I stopped myself and realized, “Oh no, it has really happened. I’m becoming a butt toy hoarder.” Seriously, I sound like a grandmother who has lived through the depression and buys 20 lbs. of potatoes every time they go on sale. I really, really don’t need toys I’m not going to use or rather, can’t physically use at all. Right now I have two plugs in my drawer that haven’t been used. Do I really need more?

So, I decided it was time to lay down some rules for buying new toys:

1) If it is a hard material like glass or metal make sure to buy it a little smaller than I would in silicone.
2) If it’s silicone, calculate the give, but don’t think that I can take something a full ½” bigger than the largest one I have at the time.
3) Don’t buy anything with more than a ¼” jump from the biggest one I currently own.

After applying all of these rules my eyes came back into reality. I decided that I should only buy things I’m sure I can use and never buy anything for future use, no matter how good the deal looks to be. Because let’s face it, how much money do college students really have to spare for something they’re not going to use? Yeah, I agree – none. Also, most of the regular reviewers on EdenFantasys have enough toys to give one to every citizen of a small town. Do we really need more?

In conclusion, I know this is something you probably already know, but I also know how tempting it can be to get just that one plug that has been catching your eye to use later on. My only advice is to wait and it will make using that plug when you finally get it so much more enjoyable. Seriously, who doesn’t love running in with their box from outside, washing the toy and using it right then and there?[1] Have fun and don’t let your eyes rule your ass.

[1] Unless it’s 10 degrees outside and your toy happens to be metal or glass. Freezing cold toy in my ass? No thanks. A bath of warm water will cure that just fine.

WotW: Organic
Pronunciation: \ȯr-ˈga-nik\
Function: adjective
Date: 1517
: of, relating to, yielding, or involving the use of food produced with the use of feed or fertilizer of plant or animal origin without employment of chemically formulated fertilizers, growth stimulants, antibiotics, or pesticides

I’ve noticed lately that a lot of companies have been going crazy with making sure we all know that their product is “organic.” So what exactly is organic? Well, according to Merriam-Webster it is something produced without chemicals. So how does this apply to things in reality?

We all know that organic apples are apples that have been produced without pesticides and therefore have no chemical residue in or on them. It also seems the animal agriculture industry has gotten a hold of the word and is using it to describe meat and other animal products that haven’t been given mass amounts of growth hormones. While I find it hard to believe there is such a thing as an organic cow (organic human, anyone?), fine, that’s their choice. But what happens when the sex toy and sex related products industry starts taking on the word? Can something like a lubricant, a sensitizing spray or a body wash really be organic? I set out on a journey to find out the answer to just that.

The first product I looked at was a spray meant to make anal penetration easier. As soon as I heard about this product I thought, “How can something like that be considered organic?” Upon looking at the ingredients I was met with 3 organic oils, one non-organic oil, “parfum” which is usually synthetic, silicone and also a chemical called isopropyl myristate. Well, this product has already failed its claim of being “organic” by having silicone as well as parfum and a non-organic oil. But I was more intrigued by what this other chemical was. A quick search revealed that while it may be a product of organic chemistry, isopropyl myristate is far from organic. It is used in medicines for absorption through the skin and can also be found in mouthwash.

Other product investigations yielded ingredients like Sodium laureth sulphate, Cocamidopropyl betaine, Cocamide DEA, Parfum, PEG-7 Glyceryl cocoate, Sodium chloride and more. These are definitely not on the same level as the organic bananas sitting in my fruit basket. They were not just plucked out of nature and popped into a bottle. They were made in a lab somewhere. If this is your idea of what an organic product should be, then disregard my post, but if you think that organic has become nothing more than a buzzword I highly encourage you to look up the ingredients in the products you are purchasing under the pretense of them being “organic.” I understand my lubricant doesn’t have all natural ingredients in it and that’s okay, but misleading customers by saying your product is organic when it only contains a couple of essential oils? That to me is deceiving to the customer. They can say their products are body-safe, but as soon as they cross into the organic territory it all becomes very fishy.

Now I’m going to go back to eating my banana and leave the supposedly organic products alone.

I keep my sex blogger identity pretty sheltered in my everyday life for a few simple reasons. Mainly, because my campus is very conservative and I need graduate school recommendations. However, every once in a while something comes up on my campus that makes me wish I were more out so I could inform people about sexuality. One of these instances came up just the other day when my school’s newspaper-turned-magazine published an article on “naughty gifts” for the holidays.
First, I was very surprised to even see this article seeing that my school treats its students as children that can’t make decisions for themselves about sexuality, life or anything at all. The administration seems to think that they are getting paid to play babysitter to 20-somethings rather than teaching. Because I have a relationship with one of the faculty members, I was referred to as an “immature child” and he was told being with me is just the same as if he were with a 13-year-old girl. Great move, university. Comparing your faculty in consensual relationships with pedophiles. Great move.
Secondly, I was saddened to see the kind of information the article included. The ideas ranged from sharing jelly toys to “spice things up,” putting whipped cream directly onto genitals and failing to properly explain what a rabbit vibrator or a cock ring actually is. I was reading this article as I went to the car to go home and when my partner got there I started immediately ranting about how I was going to out myself and write in to the editor to correct the misconceptions that the campus now held.
I had it all planned out perfectly. I was going to say, “While I was glad to see that [insert my university] is finally open to talking about sexuality with the student body, the recent article about sex toys as gifts included some missing information as well as incorrect information. When mentioning sharing toys, it should have been mentioned that toys should never be shared unless they are covered with a condom during use or they are made of a material like silicone that can be completely sterilized by boiling. Also, while whipped cream could be fun to apply to areas like the stomach, thighs, etc. it should not come into contact with genitals because of the risk of a yeast infection or a urinary tract infection. . . ” Yes! It was going to be perfect and finally draw some much needed attention to the lack of sexual information on campus. Then I was quickly brought back down to earth by my partner. My college is not liberal. It is not sex-positive. It doesn’t even offer reproductive health services of any type.
I looked at the name of the author and quickly recognized the name as a stuck-up fraternity member who frequently says derogatory comments about women. Then I noted the source he used for the article. It was a sex toy shop called “Exotica.” Unfortunately I’ve seen this store and it’s full of nothing more than cheap porn, jelly dildos, bad lubricants and a few nitrile cock rings. After some discussion with my partner we determined that since this article lacked seriousness and also journalistic style, he was probably dared by a friend to write an article about the “dildo store” and convince his editor to publish it. Considering my campus claims it is a “dry campus” and then runs articles about professor’s favorite drinks, it wouldn’t be too hard to get it published.
My partner appreciates my sex-positive and body-positive views, but instantly knew what the rest of the campus and the administration would think as soon as I signed my name to that letter talking about safety, positivity and sexual expression – they would call me a slut. A whore. A dirty cunt. You name it and they would call me it. I sadly agreed as I’ve seen this happen with women on campus who voice their opinions or even dare to admit that they have sex in a public manner (i.e. not just to the doctor who can’t tell anyone). I couldn’t risk not getting recommendations for graduate school, so I sadly bowed out from writing the letter to the editor.
It’s not just the administration and the student body, but even the campus doctor. When going in for a second look at my urinary tract infection that wasn’t going away he told me that if a certain antibiotic didn’t clear it up I’d need to “find a lady doctor” to look “down there” because that’s “not something a man can do.” I realize he’s not a gynecologist and that I should be referred to one if I need it, but the fact that he phrased it like that coupled with the fact that he can’t even ask me when my last period was without getting embarrassed is more than a little shameful. The time before that appointment I saw the nurse practitioner and she told me that I shouldn’t be having sex because that’s “not what girls my age should be doing.” Really? What should 21-year-old women be doing? Feeling dirty because we have vaginas? I don’t think so. She even went so far as to point to the basket of condoms in the lobby and try to make a joke by saying, “Oh my! What kind of girls do they think go here? I’m not that kind of girl!” At this point I was just happy to have some antibiotics and really didn’t want to get into a debate, so I walked out hoping I would never have to deal with this woman again.
I know, you’re thinking I should just get the hell out of there when I graduated this coming year and leave them for dead, but I feel some kind of obligation to them. Not because I like these people – it’s definitely not that, but I feel that every person has a right to accurate information about his or her own sexuality. The closest my school comes to giving this information is yearly aids testing offered for about 3 days and having a basket of condoms in the doctor’s office lobby – which of course no one ever takes because that would mean – gasp – you might be having sex with someone.
If you go to a university that comes near fitting this description, know that you are not alone. You’re probably not the only one frustrated on your campus either. I’ve talked to quite a few girls who are fed up with the lack of dialogue about sex and the lack of health services offered. If your school offers the opportunity to write anonymous letters to the editor of your newspaper, I highly encourage you to educate the student body. At least then you can say you tried, and one person out there reading might just learn something that could save them from an STI or other sexually related illness.

After writing my last article dealing with anal sex and how it is portrayed in the media, I thought more about how disrespected Sasha Grey was on the Tyra Banks show in which she appeared.1 Then last night I watched Sasha’s reply on YouTube about what happened during the show. The entire show, as mentioned in my previous post, made Sasha out to be a victim and someone who needs to quit doing “dirty” things to her body. After reading about the Sasha phenomenon I set out to find other places where pornography was slammed in mainstream American media. What I stumbled upon really surprised me.

Many of you may have heard of the Pink Cross Foundation. According to their website, thepinkcross.org, “Pink Cross Foundation is a faith-based IRS approved 501(c)(3) public charity dedicated to reaching out to adult industry workers offering emotional, financial and transitional support.” At first I thought this was a positive thing. Helping women who choose to no longer work in the sex industry transition and find new jobs – sounds like a plan to me. However, I soon found out this was not the case. Upon opening the website I saw a banner that read, “Where addicts find healing and pornstars find hope” with a picture of a blond woman tied up, her mouth taped and looking as though she has been crying. This alone makes me angry. To assume that every woman who chooses to go into porn has been victimized and are forced to be there by someone holding them at gun point is nothing more than a lie. Are there some women who would like to have a job other than porn? Sure. Are there some issues in the porn industry? Of course, just like with every other industry. But to say that is so blanketed and misinformed that the site loses any credibility they would have had.

The second thing I noticed, after re-reading the statement was that this is a “faith-based” organization. Therefore, instead of trying to address the issues in the porn industry from an objective standpoint, the foundation is viewing everything through a Judeo-Christian lens. This can be detrimental as not all people in the porn industry subscribe to this religion and can also be offensive to people of all genders and sexual orientations that have worked hard to help people understand that sexual expression is natural and is not a “dirty” thing that needs to happen only in the bedroom between a cis man and woman. If people choose to make a living out of expressing their sexuality and enjoying sex, that should not be shamed.

Off to the side of the webpage there is a list about facts about pornography. I will say that some of these facts are good to bring to the attention of the public. Such as, “70% of sexually transmitted infections in the porn industry occur in females.” and “Chlamydia and Gonorrhea among performers is 10x greater than that of LA County 20-24 year olds.” These can raise awareness about STDs not only in pornography, but in the lives of people everywhere. STD prevention is something everyone can strive for and is something that should be promoted more in today’s society.

However, later on there are also statements saying things like the biggest audience of pornography is made up of teenagers. This is both offensive as well as indicative of sex education in the United States. I’m going to tackle this in two separate points as follows:

1) It is offensive – This statement is offensive beyond the fact that the legal age for viewing porn is 18 in the United States. It also implies that teenagers are not sexual, are not going to explore sexuality and it is bad that they are interested in learning about sex.

2) It is indicative of sex education in the United States – As stated before, I am not against teenagers viewing porn. It is almost bound to happen, however, the problem comes in when teenagers view porn as sex education. When this happens they don’t get exposure to things like birth control and STD prevention, they don’t get to know that anal sex is something that is prepared for and they might have too many expectations of what sex should be like. However, this is not the fault of pornography. Porn is meant to be fantasy. The reality is that sex education needs to be improved to include not only birth control and STD prevention, but also dialogue between peers about sexuality and what is realistic vs. what is fantasy.

If the Pink Cross Foundation really wanted to help women they would be increasing sex education and letting women know that they have choices rather than shaming them into either being “good” women or “dirty” women and victims of their own occupations. Before this organization can do any good at all they need to realize that not every person they come across is going to share their religion and by basing their foundation on religion, they are not only making sex something shameful, they are also excluding many women who may otherwise appreciate their efforts.

I want to make clear that this is not meant to be an overall slam on the Pink Cross Foundation, it is meant to be a critique of an organization that could improve itself to actually do the mission it claims it does rather than to use Christianity to shame women and others into being sexual beings. That mission is that they are “dedicated to reaching out to adult industry workers offering emotional, financial and transitional support.” That could be wonderful for women wanting to change careers, and as long as this change of careers is voluntary and is what the actors and actresses want themselves, I would be more than supportive of the Pink Cross Foundation. However, as they are now, the Pink Cross Foundation will not win my support and I believe that anyone who is sex-positive would agree. Should the Pink Cross Foundation change its ways, I will willingly support them in any way that I can.
1 The video can be found on YouTube simply by searching “Tyra Banks Sasha Grey” for those who are interested.

Inspired by Newme21’s recent post Life at 50: My Sexual Bucket List, I’ve decided to make my own list. While it’s not really a bucket list, it is kind of like those lists your 2nd grade teacher made you write about your 5 main goals in life. You know, the ones where you said you wanted to be an astronaut – but only if your teacher had been someone like Tristan Taormino instead of Mrs. Thomas.

#1. I’d like to get more anal toys
Up until now I’ve just been experimenting with fingers and a couple of plugs, but I’d really like to expand my collection to include more plugs and other types of anal toys like some of Fun Factory’s silicone beads. My goal is to end up with a collection of anal toys that rivals my toys for vaginal use.

#2. Be a spreader of good news
I want to inform people, at least my close friends, about the pleasure involved in anal . I want to encourage them to talk to their partners and see if anal play is something they would like to try. I know that there are many people who are still under the impression that anal sex is only going to be painful and dirty, much as I was before I starting reading more about the topic. I’d like to help break people out of that stereotype as much as I can.

#3. Experience an anal orgasm
As someone who only recently (as in yesterday) figured out how to squirt and have an orgasm that isn’t fully clitoral, I know learning to have an anal orgasm is going to be a long and frustrating road, but I’m willing to travel it. And accomplishing this also leads me on to my next goal which is. . .

#4. Have anal sex with my partner
Even though I currently play with toys, I have not yet been able to have anal sex with my partner and it’s something I would really like to do. Not only is my partner chomping at the bit to fuck my ass, but I would feel accomplished in being in tune with my body and being able to train myself to have anal sex pleasurably.

#5. Experience double penetration
I’ll admit it, I’ve always been incredibly turned on by DP in porn films. I have tried having vaginal sex with a butt plug in, but I don’t think it would be quite the same experience as having my partner and a dildo at the same time. Obviously this is the biggest thing on my list, but I still think it is doable.

What are your 5 main aspirations for your sexuality? This list is definitely not and end-all be-all list. I hope to keep my list growing, expanding and evolving in to more detail as I learn more and experience more.

Every year on World AIDS Day people from around the world talk about the problem of HIV/AIDS on the African continent. They insist that the people of Africa should have better access to things like condoms and have access to education about STI prevention and birth control. I couldn’t agree more. However, it strikes me as odd that people think that the United States can teach anything to other countries if it can’t take care of its own. Until there is comprehensive sex education in the States, your friends and neighbors will be just as in need of the same aid that people suggest the United States send to Africa.
When I was in high school I was one of the lucky ones. After the required talks about abstinence and the horrifying videos showing every kind of STI possible with a kind message at the end telling us something like “true love waits,” my teacher closed the door and preceded to ask if anyone had a moral objection to her talking briefly about contraception. After everyone said it was fine she proceeded to tell us how to put on a condom, where to get them for free in the area and answered questions about different kinds of birth control. The sad thing? Trying to educate us could have easily gotten her fired. Under the requirements of abstinence only education it is strictly forbidden to even mention condoms and other forms of birth control, let alone explain where these can be obtained and how to properly use them.
While many people thought that abstinence only education would be shown the door when President Obama took office in January, abstinence only education quickly got refunded and it doesn’t appear that it’s going to bow out anytime soon. The idea behind abstinence only education is that it will prevent all unwanted pregnancies and STIs by teaching kids that abstinence is the only way to go. But as anyone can see, this program doesn’t address one of the biggest issues – people are going to have sex if they want to no matter what you tell them. Instead of lying to themselves and saying that this type of program works, they should take a step back and ask if it’s better to shame kids into thinking sex is wrong and bad or if it would be better to openly discuss sexuality to help adolescents and teens make well-informed and healthy decisions about their future and their sexual well-being.
Therefore, I propose that World AIDS Day not only be a day for AIDS awareness, but also a day for awareness of the current state of sex education in the United States. I encourage you to write into local newspapers, local and state governments and even the president to try to get this changed. Although I don’t plan on having children, I don’t want future generations getting the same sub-par sexual education that I received. I want them to have more resources for making informed choices about what is best for them and not what it best for their parents, their best friend or for their pastor. Teenagers need to be trusted with their own bodies instead of constantly told that some Big Brother figure knows what is best for them.
If you have a teenager currently dealing with this abstinence only education model or know someone who is, I highly recommend you read The Purity Myth by Jessica Valenti. It deals with the abstinence-only education and its downfalls. This way, when you set out to change the world (by changing the legislation) you can be well informed and ready for whatever comes at you. In conclusion, talk to the teenagers you know about sex from a positive and open point of view. Talk to your friends who are parents about what their children are being taught in school and challenge them to talk to their children about the other options out there. And you know what? Pass out some condoms – you can feel good for giving people a means to protect themselves from STIs like HIV/AIDS all while spiting the system that perpetuates sexual shame and lack of knowledge of how to protect against disease.

Archaeologists report finding evidence of the oldest known cultivation and use of cacao, the main ingredient in chocolate, at a site in Puerto Escondido, Honduras, dating from about 1100 to 1400 BC. Damn, that’s some old shit. So how does something so ancient once used in everyday life come to be so loved in almost every culture in the world? How did it come to be such a sensual treat?
The Aztecs and the Maya both drank cacao as a bitter frothy drink, sometimes fermented into alchohol. Alcoholic chocolate? Count me in! It wasn’t until the Spanish conquest of the Americas that chocolate got sugar added into it and became the treat we know it as today. Apart from being a favorite childhood treat and something everyone seems to be gifted on Valentine’s Day (even if it’s from their mother), chocolate has evolved to have a sensual, almost sexual aura.
Even though I’m not a fan of their chocolate, look at the Dove chocolate commercials. The women are surrounded by flowing silky fabric and have a look on their faces like they are having the best orgasm of their lives. All because they just bit into a square of grocery store chocolate.
So whether you like it white, milk, dark or somewhere in between, you can always be aware that even if you’re eating chocolate in front of your 80-year-old neighbor, you’re indulging in a piece of sensual bliss.
Saraid recommends: Chocolove Single Origin Tanzania, Ritter Sport 50% Dark and Green and Black’s Maya Gold