Before having my son, I never really had to deal with stress. Sure, I had it at work and sometimes at home, but I was pretty good at handling it all. I could leave work-related stress at the door and never carried it home with me. Any other stress I could let easily roll of me with the thinking that everything would be alright.

Now though…it’s like “Oh hello there stress!” I have so much to get done throughout the day that it has become a bit overwhelming. I stay at home with my son, which is an opportunity I wouldn’t trade for the world, but I also have to find the time to work. I am a freelance writer, and sometimes that means deadlines need to be met. I am also a blogger, which also comes with deadlines, especially since I manage 3 blogs.

Not only do I have the stress of impending deadlines, I also have the financial stress that comes with needing to get the work done in order to be paid. Add to that the need to keep the house clean, laundry done, and the baby taken care of, and you have quite a bit of weight piled on your shoulders!

Some days are great, and I get everything done that I need to. Other days, however, my beautiful little boy likes to fight sleep, which means no naps during the day. No naps means no work time for mommy. No work time for mommy means a huge amount of stress. I try to work in the evenings when my hubby is here to care for the baby, but then there’s cooking, cleaning, bath time for baby, and just relaxing with my hubby that I need/want to do. He helps out as much as he can, but sometimes there just isn’t enough time in the day!

So, how do I de-stress? My first step is the gym. We go to the gym 3 times a week, and I try as hard as I possibly can to focus on myself and my workout during that time. I try not to let work, home, and baby worries get to me while I’m kicking butt (or rather, getting my butt kicked). It usually takes a few minutes for the stress to go away, but it is true that exercise is a great stress buster.

Another way I de-stress is sex. Yes, probably the most common stress reliever in the world. It does the trick though, so long as I/my hubby can get me in the mood. Once I’m in the groove, all of the worries of the day just float away. It’s even more fun when we make the time for foreplay and/or toys.

Masturbation is yet another preferred stress reliever for me. I don’t have a lot of time to do this, which is why I think it is so great when it happens. Since I’ve been reviewing toys the past couple months, I have really started to accumulate a nice stash of toys to assist in my efforts for de-stressing and taking time for myself. I always have quite a selection to choose from when I need to get away from all the worries for a while.

So, there you have it. My three favorite de-stressing methods. Most of the time, one of these three activities will help me take my mind off things in order to regroup and tackle whatever it is that is getting to me at the moment.

The month of December is a very busy month for me and my family, with so many activities relating to Christmas. It begins on the first Saturday of the month, which is the annual Christmas parade. For years, we were in the parade, either for me, my sister, or my brother. I’ve been in the float for baton class, gymnastics (with my sister), girl scouts, boy scouts (with my brother), basketball, and church activities.

This meant we were actually busy in November, helping to prepare the float we would ride on throughout the parade. The past few years, however, my siblings and I haven’t really been involved in anything, and the church we attend hasn’t been involved either. We still enjoy going to watch the parade as it comes through town.

Our extended family Christmas dinner on my mom’s side is always on the second Saturday in December. This involves going to my aunt’s to see about 50 family members, some of which I only see at Easter, Thanksgiving, and/or Christmas. My sister and I generally volunteer to help my aunt set everything up, so we are down there practically all day.

The week of Christmas is even more busy/hectic. December 23 is the annual date for my step-dad’s family Christmas dinner. That involves driving almost an hour north in order to eat and spend time with that family. Luckily, I’m not asked to help out with this one as much, so I am free to arrive and leave whenever I want.

Christmas Eve is the dinner for my mom’s immediate family. This involves my grandmother, mom and her family, and aunt and her family. Again, I’m usually roped into helping with this one, so the day is spent cooking, setting up, and cleaning up afterward. We usually make it home just in time to pass out before Christmas morning.

That morning is spent at my parent’s house. It used to be the time that we did “Santa” but now the past few years, it’s just been my parents and siblings exchanging gifts. I assume we will revert back to Santa in the next year or two for my son’s sake. Breakfast is eaten at my parent’s house, followed by lunch with some of my step-dad’s family.

And of course, you can’t forget the after-Christmas returns and shopping that occur the following day. Why we don’t wait until the middle of January to return gifts is beyond me. We do manage to land some great deals as far as the shopping is concerned.

As you can see, my December’s are always so busy and hectic. This doesn’t include all of the Christmas shopping I do throughout the month…including the last minute shopping my sister and I do for my step-dad. He’s only in charge of getting the gifts for my mom’s stocking, but he waits until at least the 23rd to ask us to go get them for him. It also doesn’t include the Christmas luncheon I usually have to make something for at my husband’s work, the wrapping of all the gifts I have bought, or the decoration of our home for Christmas.

It so much fun to spend time with family, sing Christmas songs, and have good dinners during the month of December. However, by the time Christmas is here, I just want it to be January so I can relax!!

What does giving mean to you? When I first read this question, my first thought was, to present something to someone. That was the meaning, plain and simple…but as I was thinking about it, I realized there is actually a bit more to it than that. The Dictionary.com definition is similar to mine, though it has an added phrase, as it states, “to present voluntarily and without expecting compensation.”

“Without expecting compensation.” Is that really the case, 100% of the time? Of course not. There are some things that we give to others and expect – or at least hope – for something in return. Take our hearts, for example. When you fall in love with someone and give them your heart, don’t you expect theirs in return? Now I know it doesn’t always work out that way, but you do tend to have the expectation that it will when you are pining for them.

Now that I am thinking about it, I don’t know if that statement can really be accurate in most cases. When I give a gift, whether it is a monetary donation or an actual item, I don’t expect anything in return. Though, I do tend to receive something…the satisfaction of knowing that I made someone’s day brighter. Or that I helped someone receive a nice warm meal. Or that a child will have a good Christmas this year. So there again, maybe we do expect some compensation – the good feeling we get in return when we help others by giving something.

It is the same way with our time. Volunteering, tutoring, or doing anything for free that involves giving our time for others usually doesn’t warrant something in return. It still gives us the warm feeling of being helpful though. Even if you don’t knowingly expect that, you still do the things that you do because you know they will make you feel good when you help others.

I guess the point I am trying to make is that, while we don’t expect a monetary or physical item in return for giving, we do expect the emotions that we experience by helping others. It may be an unconscious expectation, but I feel that it is still there for most people and in most situations. I know for me personally, it is that way. I enjoy helping others, especially during the holidays, and I love the feeling that giving brings to me.

That’s not to say that I or anyone else gives what we do just to get the satisfying feelings. No, I know we do these things because we want to help. Or because someone is worse off than us and really needs some assistance. I’m just saying that the gratification that comes from our actions of giving is something that we expect/want. We generally do not want something from the actual recipient of our gift, but the feelings of being a good family member, friend, or citizen, which are presented to us through our acts.

Therefore, when I think about the meaning of giving, I would say that I do think it is about getting something in return…in most cases it’s not a physical item I am looking for, but the warm fuzzies of being able to put a smile on someone else’s face.

All of my life, I have never been one that has had to have sex. It just wasn’t a big deal to me. Maybe my ex’s were partially to blame. I first had sex when I was 16 years old with my high school sweetheart. I didn’t have my first orgasm that was produced by someone other than me until I was 22. It took 6 years for me to meet a man that could actually get me off, which also happens to be the man I married.

Even in our marriage though, I have not needed sex. I will occasionally go through periods where I want to do sexual things every day. But even then, it wasn’t always sex. Sometimes I was good with just a bit of foreplay or oral before bed. Plus, those periods usually only last a week or two.

This all changed when I got pregnant.

During the first 16 weeks of my pregnancy, I was miserable. Therefore, sex was the last thing on my mind. However, after the first trimester ended and the morning sickness went away, it’s like I was hit with this insatiable need for all things sex. My husband and I were doing something to satisfy my needs every night…sometimes more than once a night. I was a bit scared at first, since I was carrying a child.

After a while though, it became part of our lives and I wasn’t worried at all. This continued until I was about 30 weeks pregnant. The sex slowed down considerably, but not because I didn’t want it…but because it was pretty uncomfortable. We were down to one position (me on top) that didn’t make me feel like I couldn’t breathe or that we were squishing our baby.

We still had sex then, but it didn’t last as long, and it was only about 1-2 times a week.

After I had my son, I went back into that state of “meh” when thinking about sex. I was actually kind of worried that I was only going to be really sexual when I was pregnant. You hear of so many women that become completely turned off by sex after having a baby that I was afraid that I was going to be one of those. I didn’t want to be, especially after all the fun my husband and I had had while I was pregnant.

Turns out, it must have just been due to the exhaustion and soreness of popping out an 8 pound baby. Three weeks after giving birth, I started wanting to do things in the bedroom. I couldn’t, of course, since my doctor gave me a strict “no sex for 6 weeks” order the day I was discharged from the hospital.

This didn’t keep us from fooling around though. I think my husband got more blow jobs in those six weeks than ever in his life!! I didn’t get much other than some heavy petting, nipple sucking, and whatever you can do from the waist up.

Once the six weeks were up, we were right back in the saddle. My son just turned 9 weeks old, so we’ve had three straight weeks of sex at 4-5 days a week. This is still a huge increase from before I got pregnant. We’ve began incorporating toys more often, something that we only did on occasion before I got pregnant. It’s strange how people say you will never find the time to have sex once you have a baby. We’ve had no problems! This is not to say we neglect our child, but sometimes the housework goes undone or we sacrifice sleep so that we can enjoy some bedroom fun.

It’s also strange that it took my getting pregnant to have so much fun with sex. I don’t know if that is actually the reason, but I believe it had something to do with it!