Sexual health is never stressed enough. There is a gold mine of information out there that usually just fills up space, because so many people are careless and enjoy the thrill and excitement of sex, and not the responsibility of it. I had sex for the first time at a very young age. I have been sexually active for ten years, which may seem small to the older population, however I have grown and learned from it. Sex has directly impacted my life. Ten years ago I knew little about sexual health. I plunged off the bridge and into the sheets with a boyfriend, and never looked back. I was irresponsible and childish. I was still a child when I began having sex. It is a shame that so many young people dive right in without a single thought of the consequences. From my experience, I have learned that sex should wait. You should research statistics and information about what you are doing. Sex has always been a desire, an addiction, way back to hundreds of years ago. Along with that has come STD’s, STI’s, and even cancers related to sex. We need to be educated on sex. There needs to be more serious talk rather than just sexuality. It is true, sex is utopia, but like all other things… most good things also have their bad side. Be smart. Read the facts and get the information on sex before you jump into it. It is about being responsible. You have to be responsible enough to take the steps to protect yourself, or what was once your desire of a heated moment, can become your worst nightmare.

I did not know very much when I starting having sex. I remember having a short Sex Ed class in Junior High School, and that was it. Some kids are lucky enough to have really open parents that give them the information they need. Me? Not so lucky. The only talk I got was, “You are grounded until I take you to get some birth control.” I had no idea what having sex at such a young age would do to my body. Now, ten years later, I live in regret of it. I wish I knew then what I know now.

Did you know that “Cervical Cancer is the fifth most common cancer in women worldwide, with approximately 471,000 new cases diagnosed each year. In less developed countries, this type of cancer is the second most common in women, and accounts for up to 300,000 annual deaths. 80% of the cases occur in low-income or middle-income countries,” according to CervicalCancer.Org. A women dies from cervical cancer every two minutes, and the most devastating idea is that in most cases, it could be prevented or caught early enough to treat with the right health care, information, and check ups. Cervical cancer also attacks women of every age. “Although the average age of diagnosis is 50, women as young as 17 can contract the disease.” (CervicalCancer.Org)

I am 24 years old and have been treated twice already for cervical cancer. Back in 2006, I was diagnosed and underwent treatment, which put me in remission for five years. Last October I was not feeling well and went to the doctor to undergo tests, to find that it was back again. I had another surgery and am now cancer free again. How is this related to sexual health? There are underlying risk factors, as with any cancer. More commonly than not, with cervical cancer, a person’s sexual activity can directly affect their chances of getting it. “Women who have had had early sexual activity, before 18 years of age, are more at risk, as the cervical cells are very fragile at this young age.” A scary fact. I was told that because of my activeness at such a young age, I most likely caused my own cervical cancer. Of course there is no way of proving this, but the evidence is very strong. Cervical cancer does not run in my family. I have not had many partners, but I have been very active. I have never been infected with HPV. The only thing left was my choice to be irresponsible at a young age. There are other causes, as well, including a family history of it, multiple sex partners, exposure to HPV, smoking, multiple pregnancies, high glucose levels, lack of regular medical care, etc. The list goes on. This is why being sexual smart and savvy is so important.

Women should be checked annually, as young as 13 years of age. Regular check ups, and knowing the risks, can greatly influence your sexual health. Had I known that I might get cervical cancer because I chose to have sex at such a young age, I might have thought twice about what I was doing. I just did not have the information. No one gave it to me. That is why it is so important to look after yourself; get the facts, and know what you are getting yourself into. I still love sex. I enjoy it very frequently. But now I have learned that I need to educate myself on everything that I do sexually; whether I am buying a new sex toy, lubricant, condoms, taking birth control, or choosing a partner. Sexual health is the first step for me now. I want the best for my body, and I think that this concern needs to be addressed more often. Love yourself, and educate yourself on sex. That should always be the first step.

I never pictured myself as an ‘anal’ kind of girl. I always had misconceptions about it. I thought it was dirty and something that would be terribly painful. I can remember back when I thought it was disgusting and anytime the old man asked me to, my direct and immediate answer was always no.

It wasn’t until a few years back when it accidentally happened that I stumbled into anal sex. It was one of those times when we were really into it and some slippage happened and hello! We were there already so we kept going. I have to admit, the first few times were uncomfortable. I did not enjoy myself, however I was pleased that my partner did. I continued with this from time to time to keep him happy, whilst I grimaced at the idea of having to partake in anal sex. Amazing enough I continued and a while longer down the road and a little bit of whiskey later… I realized the potential of anal sex and opened the flood gates to something inside me that craved it.

We had a few (or more) drinks that night. Some good ole whiskey and we were ready to buck like rabbits. We were on the couch and I was on top. My man pulled himself out of me and aimed right for my ass. I still remember saying, “I don’t think I can do that.” He said I could. Okay? So I went with it. I tried it. With a little ease and taking my time I accomplished cowgirl anal sex and then it happened. I enjoyed anal sex for the very first time and have been running full throttle towards it ever since. I have since tried toys, plugs, and various positions. I still have to admit, there is something about controlling myself that always makes it more enjoyable.

Over the last year, I fell into a slump again. I had a load of emotional and health problems. Stress was high and sex levels were way down. I was laying in the bed the other day thinking about how just overnight I took away all the fun from our bedroom. The anal sex stopped, the oral sex stopped, and the wild sex turned into fast quickies. I could not believe how boring I had gotten. This was not like me! I laid there thinking about how a man felt when he went from having basically anything he could want in bed, back to nil. I was determined to get out of my slump and spice things up again.

I was taking a hot bubble bath a couple of days ago and picked up my book The Ultimate Guide to Anal Sex for Women and read it for what seemed like an hour. As I turned each page again I was more open this time. I stuck myself to every word and soaked it all up. I still admire this book so much because it has so much insight and determination. The goal is to unmask anal sex for what it is. Nothing dirty, wrong, or painful; but rather something that is beautiful, exhilarating, and emotionally connective. The book was right too. Any set of lovers can have traditional sex and enjoy the pleasure as others do. However, anal sex is a new bond all in its self. I feel like I give everything to my partner when I offer my ass unto him and the connection is indescribable. I set my book down, drained the tub, and went about my evening as usual. Later that evening we were laying in bed and things went sexy. I was laying face down on our bed enjoying him thrust against me. I still don’t know what hit me and I am sure he doesn’t either, but I planted my hands on the bed, forced myself up and with the quick action of a roll I was on top of him and aiming his shaft straight for my ass. I enjoyed it. I missed it.

I shudder to think how many women still believe anal sex is dirty and painful like I did when I was a little younger. If only they knew. I almost let it go again myself. I am glad that I was able to find solace in a book and shift it back in overdrive. Who knew a guide would have that much of a turn-around in my life? I didn’t. I still think it is amazing what the inspiration of a book can do. And of all things it did, and all things strange… a book brought me back to anal paradise.

Having children is a wonderful experience. Growing up, getting married, and having a family is what we all dreamed of when we were kids, right? Our dreams soon turn into it’s your turn to change the diaper, easy grab dinners, and working over time just to pay the mortgage. Okay, so not everyone has this exact experience, but I think I am pretty close. The sexual heat, the lust, the daily devouring of each other soon fades. The excuses barrel in. I’m too tired, I have a headache, I don’t feel good, I need to get some sleep, etc, etc, etc. There is a natural block of affection after all our dreams come true. How do we fix it? What can parents do to bring back the passion and the lust?

I have been through many trials and tribulations. Late night work hours just to come home and clean the entire house. I have slept three hours and started my day to crying and the usual to do list. I have been exhausted and to the point where I don’t even want to be touched.

It took a long time for me to realize that going without sex was actually wearing more on my relationship that the kids and finances combined. The lack of sex with my man was ripping us apart. We had so much tension built up, and who would of thought, if only we knew that sex is exactly what we needed. That time together. The freedom to caress each other naked and play around. Cuddle and snuggle and make love. This is what we needed. We had to find the time to release with each other.

We have four children. Time is not always on our side. It gets harder to sneak off to the bedroom for a quickie as our children grow older. Babysitter… what’s that? It’s tough, but not impossible. We talked about finding ways to improve our time together and get what we both needed, each other. Soon we were having late night rendezvous, experimenting with sex toys, and finding new places to turn up the heat.

We began taking a shower together every night which gave us a good 30 minutes of alone time to do as we pleased. Often we teased each other and sensually caressed one another under the hot water. By the time we hit the bed we were ready to attack each other. There we were ripping our clothes off and flying under the covers for our midnight snack. I think when we decided to buy our first sex toy together it opened up a floodgate. We were addicted. After that first experience with our new found friend we found excuses to hide in the bedroom and play with it. We found adventure in something so simple.

After a short time we realized that taking the time every day to pleasure each other took away the stress from every day. The one thing that we were avoiding was now what we couldn’t go without. Excitement was found in never knowing where, when, or what we were going to do next. Would it be the shower, the table, the couch, the bed, the floor? Would be play with lotions, oils, candles, and toys? We began setting up special surprises for each other. I would lay chocolates across the bed and then treat him to a late night massage with body snow and luscious licking as I fed him delicate chocolates. Each day was a treat to each other.

Sex after kids is not impossible. Pampering each other can be done. Sneaking around like teenagers is a must and trying new things is never wrong. Many people make the same mistake we did. Being tired and just rolling over to go to sleep with no affection. Bottling the stress up and then lashing out on each other. Not knowing what can be done to fix things. The worst thing a couple can do is lose the passion and the ability to pleasure each other. It is unique and all its own. The pleasure we give our lover is a power greater than any late bill, fast meal, or stress. It is the key to releasing the pressure from everything else in life. Never let sex disappear. Never lose that connection. It is when that connection is gone, that all else begins to fade.

It took us a long time to figure all of this out. I am sure many will disagree. The fact is that we started as physical attraction and full of lust, and keeping that alive is what keeps a long fulfilled relationship alive. We all dreamed of growing, getting married, and starting a family when we were kids, right? Now that our dreams have come true, we must fight to stay passionate, try new things, and never forget that our pleasure is a key to keep the flame lit.

I have been buying products from Eden Fantasys for about five years now. Never have I had a problem with the company. I discovered last year that I could review products for their company. The best part? Anyone can do it. They don’t discriminate in any way whatsoever. The only thing needed- a community to vote you in. Not too hard right? No. For me it wasn’t, but for some this can be very difficult. Why is that? I have been watching the activity on Eden Fantasys for a while now. Watching a mix of members of the community, reading blogs, and following twitter. I have never commented in a bad way towards any member of the Eden community. I’m confused, when did reviewing sex toys become about competition and bickering anyway?

I haven’t spoke out about this issue at all. I keep my ticking fingers to myself most of the time. Personally, I don’t get the drama. It’s the Internet. Many people take all of it way too seriously. But my point of writing was not to complain about the bickering. Instead I want to focus on Eden Fantasys. I find enjoyment in reviewing products for them. I wanted to write about my personal experience with the toy. There are a variety of review types. Descriptive, off site, video, testimonials, extended, sponsored, and not sponsored. A wide mix here. What I am confused about is, where does someone draw the line between the reviews. I understand that a Sponsored Descriptive review should be detailed and focused more on obviously describing the product. But when talking about all other reviews… why is a product overview considered a better review than a personal experience?

When I start writing reviews I tried to do this. Eden Fantasys has a Product Page for every product they sell and on that page there is a Product Overview. Now when I wrote a review I wanted to focus on my experience with it. Not write a product overview. Sadly, it did not take long to realize that everyone thought this wasn’t useful. Why? I have no idea. Maybe because I didn’t say what color it was? Maybe it was if I didn’t put how long a battery lasted in it? Maybe I had a grammatical error? I don’t know.

I think everyone deserves a chance to review in their own way. Eden Fantasys accepts a lot of people. Just about anyone. They give us that chance. They allow us to review products for them at absolutely no cost to us. They offer incentives like gift cards, have giveaways, and lots of other chances for some great stuff. Eden Fantasys chooses to do this. Not the members of their site. What are we complaining about? What is the big deal here? So you don’t like what someone else says on their blog or twitter. Who cares? This should never be connected into Eden Fantasys and it should not reflect how you judge a review. This is where the ranks and ratings system becomes very nasty.

It bothers me that there is so much drama on Eden these days. And to be honest, it’s over ridiculous stuff. Sometimes I feel like there are a bunch of five years old writing sex toy reviews. Imagine what Eden Fantasys would be like without ranks? Do you think everyone would get along again? Would there be less competition? Less drama? I think so. Of course there is always going to be that one person that is going to be negative about everything. That is to be expected.

Do I think Eden Fantasys will ever get rid of the rank system? No. Do I expect them to? No. I think it is a great way to get appreciation for the reviews we do. What can make it better? The way we determine how to rate each other. Reviews should be about having fun with the products, using them, and sharing our thoughts about the product. So John Doe doesn’t have the better editing or grammar skills… does this mean his review wasn’t useful at all? No it doesn’t. Miss Mary forgot to put how long she thinks the battery lasts… was her review completely useless? Absolutely not. If I am going to take the time to read a review and give it a rating, I want to know what that person thought of their experience with the toy. I don’t need the battery type, toy size, or care instructions. I can find all of that right on the product page. It’s like retyping un-needed information. Why do I need to type it up when you know you are going to look at the product page anyway? Doesn’t make much sense does it?

I have to admit, I am not practicing what I am preaching. How can I? I feel like if I write about my experience and don’t write a product description, it will be rated less useful. So yeah, I follow the pack. What else can we do? If we want to have more opportunities on Eden Fantasys we need a higher rank. If we don’t write perfect reviews then obviously we lose opportunities. I think its unfair and childish how some members act. I have made an impact on my end. I read reviews and rate them in my way of thinking. So what if they haven’t written the description for the product label. That’s not what reviewing is about for me. I want to know how it felt, a story about when they used it, their experience. Not a product description. I will continue to write reviews to the satisfaction of the members. I will continue to rate reviews in my own way. I just hope that things will change. That the drama will fade and we can get back to enjoying reviewing for Eden Fantasys.

I have made it very clear to all who know about my secret life, that I am extremely unhappy with parts of my work. I realize now I was just constantly whining and bitching about something I chose to do. I am sure I have made a few people throw up a brow, or made someone woman loathe me. I can picture some ladies saying, “yeah, she’s probably the bitch he stays up all night on that damn computer with!” I bitch and moan and groan about all the bad sides of my work, but until recently it never really hit home. Now I know how deep it runs, and how is could possibly tear my family apart.

My sister lives an hour away. She comes to visit from time to time. She had just gotten out of a bad relationship, and for some reason I felt compelled to introduce her to someone. At that point in time, I had no idea that we would never speak again.

I introduced her to a guy friend of mine. He would come to my house and hang with me and my boyfriend. I invited him over to meet her. We all had a great time. We played cards, had a few drinks, and just kicked back. I looked at it like a double date, but never imagined that months later they would still be together.

Why is all this important? The man that I introduced my sister ended up tearing us apart. To this day, I still have no idea how he found out. But he did. I began getting little hints while I was working that someone I knew was watching me. It took me time to realize who it was. A few months of this embarrassing, online torment it hit me. It was him, my sister’s boyfriend along with his best bud. They were sitting all day long in my cam model chat room and watching me. And not to get overly detailed, I will just say I did some naughty things. And this whole time they were watching me!

What the hell was I supposed to do? I couldn’t stop working as a model, hell it was my paycheck. I couldn’t tell my sister about it, she would find some way to blame me! I decided to try to ban them from my chat room. I blocked the IP address, and he used a different one. I blocked the state I live in, and that didn’t work. He always found someway to visit my room.

One weekend we made plans. My sister wanted to come over and hang out and bring her “awesome” boyfriend. What was I supposed to do? I said yes. They came over, and it changed my future forever. I said nothing. Of course there was some awkward feelings, but I kept them to myself and tried to cope with the situation. I tried to spend time with my sister and just have fun. But later, with more drinks, her boyfriend decided to become a smart ass.

I can still remember how it happened. We were all drunk having a good time. It was my boyfriend and I, and my sister and her (dick) boyfriend. So we were all drunk. And I don’t know about everyone else, but with us everything seems more dramatic when alcohol is involved! My sister and I left to get more booze, and when we came back I heard my boyfriend and my sister’s boyfriend talking about me and what I do. I was so embarrassed. And of course pissed the hell off. How could they do this to me? Like I was the flipping joke of the party. And when I get mad and my boyfriend, he gets mad at me. He stomped to our room and I stomped outside to smoke a cigarette. My sister joined me, and then her boyfriend. I was telling my sister that my boyfriend was mad at me. And then out of no where, her boyfriend states, “why is he mad? All you are doing is shaking your ass.” I don’t think I have ever been more embarrassed in my life!

It didn’t stop there. The comments he was making continued for all night. Apparently I was the only one picking up on them too. I would touch my laptop to change the music and he would smart off with something like, “you better now be doing no crazy shit over there.” I was flipping changing the damn music! And crude comments went on and on about what I do, and me “shaking my ass.”

I knew we were all drunk, but why was I the only one catching all these comments. I thought for sure if my boyfriend knew what he meant, he would be kicking some ass. But no. It turned into me crying my eyes out in my bathroom and my sister and boyfriend trying to figure out what on earth was wrong with me.

It wasn’t until the next morning that they figured out what was going on. You see my sister’s boyfriend disappeared during the night. Of course, she went to him. She had my boyfriend drive her to his house. Also that morning I told my boyfriend why I was so upset the night before. So, when he was driving her he told her everything. I had no idea he was going to do that. I found out when he got home, and I had to call my sister. She was furious. She now knew that her boyfriend had been watching me on an adult cam site. I can’t put into words how she must have felt. I know it made me sick to my stomach. She said she was leaving him and told me she wasn’t mad at me, and this was not my fault. I heard all the garbage he told her. He said “well it’s not my fault, maybe she should have a different occupation.” Really? Come on. She came back to my house and stayed until evening. I felt so bad. She asked for a ride to her friend’s house so she could vent. I took her. She never came back. She ended up at that loser’s house back in his arms. And now does not talk to me. I get no phone calls, no visits, nothing. I even visited my parents with her their and she didn’t say one word to me. Our family has been torn apart.

I still have no idea how her boyfriend found me on the internet. I still don’t know why he did this. I don’t know what he told my sister to turn her against me. I do know one thing, this is my secret life as a cam model that is no longer so secretive.

For those of you who do not know who I am, let me introduce myself. I am Amanda and I review sex toys for Eden Fantasys. I have wrote close to 100 reviews and have enjoyed every step of it. I have stated a few times that I am a web cam model. If you did not know, well now you do. I have noticed a variety of web cam models come through Eden and have also enjoyed their reviews. It is a secret that I have tried to keep hidden for quite some time, but realized it was inevitable to do so. I have been through so many emotions, changes, and struggles with my line of work. I know now that I am not the only person here that must feel this way. So this is me, and my life as a cam model.

I never imagined that being an adult web cam model would be my line of work. I worked in clerical positions and then nursing for years. I actually stumbled upon it. I must admit, I am a sucker for porn. I watch it all the time. I can still remember the day I was on porn hub and hit that “live sex” tab. That single decision changed my life forever. After hitting “live sex,” I soon discovered that people used web cams to make money from home. At the time, I chose to investigate this. I was in a rough spot in my life and really needed to save money. I know now this probably was not the best decision, but it seemed that way at the time. I found a website that paid 50% earnings and all I had to do was masturbate in front of a camera. It seemed like a pretty simple, fun situation. I was wrong. And even though I am still a cam model, I sometimes regret the road I have taken.

The money is good, no, it’s damn great! I can make $100 an hour some days. The possibilities are endless in my line of work. It just depends on the members and the shows. It works like this. I sign in and turn my web cam on. I have my own chat room. Members then join my chat room. Members can then take me into a private session. This is where the naughty things happen. I do whatever the member ask of me (within my limits) and I am compensated in return. I make $1.50 a minute while in private sessions. So, like I said the money is good. The bad side? I have been on an emotional roller coaster ever since I began.

First, hiding something like this from my family has not been easy. No where near it. I get questions like “where is your money coming from,” “what do you do,” and a mix of everything in between. I have had relatives show up at my door during sessions. It has been completely insane. My boyfriend and I have been in at least a hundred frats over it. The words I use, the times I have to work, the limits I have, what I do, etc. Like I said, roller coaster. I have been up and down and everywhere in between because of my work.

I wanted to write about my experiences because I know there are other women and men out there who are in the same line of work as myself. There are so many adult industry careers. Porn stars, models, strippers, escorts, web cam models, etc. It can be very hard for anyone doing this work. But it happens to all of us. We are hurt, battered, taunted, confused, and so much more. The emotions that come from work can be overwhelming. I wanted to speak out for everyone like me. We all know that it comes with the work, but it never makes it okay.

During my last chat session on camera there was one particular member that really got to me. I mean down deep. I have told myself over and over to never take anything they say to heart. Sometimes, it is not so easy. It’s like he looked down inside of me and found my triggers. It was terrible. He asked me for something. At the time I was sitting down and chatting with different members. I did not do what was asked of me (I was not being compensated at the time) and he turned outrageous! He called me a cunt to start with. Then it turned worse. He said things like “mama raised a lying cunt huh?” That really hurt. First, my mother is dead, and second it was just an awful thing to say. And he did not stop there. He went on to say “you’re nothing but an online whore anyway,” “bet you make mama proud,” “if you have kids I feel bad for them, mama’s a whore.” That wasn’t all. But I think I have made my point. He attacked me for two days. I could not even work. I lost all my income for two days over some jerk. I keep telling myself to never, never let it get to me. But this time it did. I’m not sure why but it did.

I struggle every day with my life and what I chose to do for work. I regret decisions I have made and the road I have taken. At the end of the day I still know it is just work. I am not the only woman in the world that works in the adult industry. I know I can still live a normal life. But the fact is sometimes it just hurts and sometimes it is just plain hard.

My name is Amanda. I review sex toys for Eden Fantasys and this is my secret life of a web cam model. It can be rough, but it is who I am.

Lately I have noticed the toll that pheromones have taken on the sex industry. It is a major market tool and actually is massively growing in the sex community. Pheromones are now found in various forms including, but not limited to: perfumes, lotions, oils, candles, supplements, etc. I never really knew what they were, and actually never noticed their label on any of my products until recently. The wheels began turning in my head, and I had an itch I just could not scratch. I looked and found numerous products with the promise of offering more sex drive with this simple chemical. I never had tried them or even heard of them. And with the mass market of this chemical, I thought it would be very helpful to research pheromones.

First of all, what are they? What are pheromones? Wikipedia offers a very broad definition that states: “A pheromone is a secreted or excreted chemical factor that triggers a social response in members of the same species. Pheromones are hormones capable of acting outside the body of the secreting individual to impact the behavior of the receiving individual.” There are also many types of pheromones that affect behavior of physiology.

I found that research on pheromones has been taking place for well over 30 years. Most studies originated with insects. And most were very obvious that pheromones were a major part of mating. It has been well documented and studies prove its existence. Mammal studies on the other hand have been much more difficult. Scientists have tested pheromones on hamsters after putting them under anesthesia, and the results were as they suspected also. But the more complex the mammal, the more difficult it is to provide scientific supportive research.

The concept of a human pheromone, or sexual scent of attraction, has been researched and debated over and over again. Testing human pheromones proves to be very difficult. Humans are highly individualized and our reactions are not as noticeable. With many years of research, it was not until 1986 when Dr. Winifred Cutler (biologist and behavior endocrine specialist) co discovered pheromones in our underarms. They found that once underarm sweat was removed, the leftover odorless materials contained pheromones.

Dr. Cutler did research related to menstrual cycles, fertility, and sex related to pheromones. Now, it is clear that pheromones do exist. The process by which our body processes them has not yet been determined. There is controversy between scientists about a vomeronasal organ or VNO. This organ is found in animals and its purpose is to perceive a substance that leads them to their mate. It is a fact that animals possess this organ, but it is argued that humans do not. Anatomists do not believe humans have a VNO. Others believe it has been found in our nostrils.

After researching, it is obvious that pheromones are a very controversial subject. There are claims that pheromones could be used as fertility treatments for those who are trying to conceive, or a contraceptive for those who choose not to. Others have claimed that couples that are experiencing sexual issues could combine therapy with pheromones to help promote desire. Then another group of researches state that pheromones are used for mood enhancement by reducing stress.

Basically, the most prominent statement that I have found is that body scents are a large part of mate attraction. Our body odors, if perceived as pleasant, are a step in the selection process. Many studies have been done with products that are now available on the market, and the larger amount of users have noticed a change in intimacy and sexual activity.

With so many opinions on pheromones, specially in humans, it is hard to decided whether or not they actually work. Without 100% (or close) evidence, I guarantee I would never spend $100 on a perfume that will make me “have sex tonight!” But, I think it is possible to experience more intimacy with a skin based product. A lotion or massage oil, possibly? But a candle? I think that stretches it a little bit. The candle may offer a relaxing scent and thereby reduce stress and open the doors for more sex. Can it offer sexual desire? Not in my opinion.

I want to continue my search and experience the handful of new products that promise more sexual desire. I want to become a part of the research, and help answer the questions that many of us have. As of now, I have learned that pheromones do exist. They are a natural hormone that can be reproduced chemically and could offer enhancement if supplemented or intensified. I would love to find a good, solid product that helps with desire. Because honestly, sometimes we just cannot light our own fire. If pheromones are the answer, I am definitely on board. But I do not want to be misled and fall into the false marketing that many companies are now promoting.

Can a relationship last without sex? A question that lurks around all relationships. It is obvious that love can be established without sex, but can it be maintained without it? There is difference between romantic relationships and sexual relationships. Sexual relationships happen all the time, and they happen without the presence of love on numerous occasions. Taking someone home from the bar, the old high school fling, and that trip to Vegas that will never be forgotten. Romantic relationships, or love, take more effort. They take more challenge and the role of two parties. But the age old question still remains. Can a relationship stay strong without the presence of a sexual relationship?
It is human nature. Our bodies are built this way. Women and men both have sexual parts, and both are very aware of their use. From a very young age, we discover sensations of sex. The first times. Yes the first times. The first time we see it, the question of “what is that,” the first touch, the first orgasm, and the first sexual experience. We slowly creep into a world full of sexual sensations and sexual desire. It is inside of all of us.
Of course, with all things there are too many opinions to count on this topic. However, mine always will remain the same. A romantic relationship just cannot last with the presence of a sexual relationship. I believe that the need for sex can be pushed aside, but never forgotten. Even in relationships that are free of sex (the waiters), the desire for it is still there. A lot of us pleasure ourselves. We use masturbation to seize our needs. But this will only sustain us for an amount of time.
A have been in a few long term relationships, and I have experienced both a fulfilling and not so much sex life. It does not take a scientist or specialist to figure out what tension exists without sex. Have you ever noticed that when sex is forgotten, and we are too busy with our lives, that we become more tense? It is obvious. Sex is a getaway. A sacred act between two people. Sex gives us everything we want. We are given closeness to our lover. Everything else goes away and we get lost in a state of extreme satisfaction. Our bodies release and we can go on living.
A relationship without sex. That is a completely different story. We never have the chance to provide pleasure to our selves through making love. Expression of physical love is replaced with fighting and ranting. And I think that no sex is the cause. Relationships cannot continue to be healthy without offering all of ones self, including the sexual experience. Take away sex, and I promise the relationship will not last. We are human. We feed off of satisfaction. And the best satisfaction we can achieve is by physically making ourselves feel happy. When we are physically stable, comfortable, and satisfied; all other things in life move easier.
Can a relationship last without sex? No it cannot. We are human. We have needs. And sex, sex is a need that we deal with everyday. Take away our physical happiness, and only havoc is left.

Saint Valentines Day is an annual holiday held on February 14th of every year. It is a day to celebrate love between intimate companions. Valentines Day was established in 496 AD. Can you believe it has been around all this time? Pope Gelasius I created this holiday and named it after a martyr, Valentine. Hence the name Saint Valentines Day. Traditionally, it was a day to express love for one another by presenting flowers, offering confectionery, and sending cards (“valentines”). The holiday first was associated with romantic love in the high middle ages in the circle of Geoffrey Chaucer. During this time period courtly love was very popular. It was a medieval European conception of nobly and chivalrously expressing love and admiration. In most cases, courtly love was a secret of the members of nobility. Also, it was not usually practiced between husband and wife. Now, common symbols of this holiday are hearts, doves, and Cupid. And once handwritten valentines, now are factory made greeting cards. A lot has changed. What once began as a simple expression of love, is now a much different practice. Valentines Day is now a huge holiday for all industries, children, and more. What happened to the real Valentines Day? What happened to just expressing love to your lover?

Last year I decided that I wanted February 14th of each year to be very special. I no longer wanted to focus on spending a large amount of money to offer up the next best gift. Not anymore. Last year, I took the old fashioned route. I wanted to show my lover what the real Valentines Day is about. Everything that I did for him last year was by my own two hands. I cooked him a homemade, authentic Italian meal. It included pasta, bread, salad, and a chocolate truffle cake for dessert. I accompanied it with a cheap bottle of wine. I managed to make everything without him having a clue of what I was doing. I put red tulips on the table and beautiful tableware. I scattered chocolate kisses across his plate and his pillow in the bedroom. I spent a whole week planning all of this, and it turned out perfect. We spent the evening together, alone and loving each other. We ate good food and talked about our love for each other. We make a note to always remember how many times we have celebrated a holiday together. Last year was our second Valentines day. And our second is so our best so far. We did not focus on how much money we were spending, or what gift we were buying. We did what we always do, but we did it together, as lovers. Because after all that is what Valentines is. Or what it used to be. Just one day, every year, that we can just recognize who we love.

I think we live fast paced lives. New things and glamour are shadowing what is really important in life. We need to stop focusing on the I want part of ourselves and start focusing on who we have in our life. Focus on our life, not what we have in status or materials. Saint Valentines day is a wonderful way to start. Instead of changing this beautiful holiday into a day to get something, turn it into a day that you show your lover how much they mean to you. That is what I want for Valentines this year. Nothing but the expression of love.

I have not decided what we are doing this year yet. I have not ran to the store looking for something to buy. I know that as long as we are together the day will be its best. One day every year that I can remind him how much I love him. One day that I can express what he means to me. One more day that I can be his Valentine.