WHAT FEMALE TEENAGERS SHOULD LEARN ABOUT RESPECT

How many innocent boys are charged with felonies every year relating to taking underage minors across state lines, rape and sexual assault? A lot, way too many and it is a never ending trend. Many community members may look down on these boys/men and ask them what the hell they were thinking, how they could be so stupid, etc… but how many of these community members are pointing fingers at the girls or asking them questions?

While rape and sexual assault does occur, it’s important to take a long hard look with as much evidence possible before we go putting innocent boys and men in prison and slapping charges on them. We live in a society where girls are taught to scream rape and use it as a weapon, especially minor girls who are in high school. How many of these incidents where young men are charged with a crime they clearly did not commit nor had any idea they were committing were in a scenario where the girls had lied about their age? A large percentage of these cases could be ruled out due to false pretenses if the system were willing to look beyond hearsay.

Such charges are putting young men from 15-21 in jail for sentences that take up most of their lives, while the girls who accused them are living life to fullest, many of them out there still lying about their ages. While yes, young men (and women even in some cases) need to recognize and honor the age of consent, this also would require the other party’s full honesty. I’m sure most of us would agree that we aren’t going to go around carding the people we sleep with.

One of the things we need to look at is if there is rape evidence if rape is being accused. Not to mention a full investigation should be done. How about finding out why a fifteen year old girl was drunk at a party that consisted of party-ers 3-5 years her senior, and why she didn’t offer her age when approached or during conversation with the other person, whom she is now accusing. Of course that would assume if she did offer her age, she was telling the truth. Does this sound harsh? Tell that to the men sitting in jail for crimes like such that they didn’t commit.

I wonder how many of these young girls are fully aware of the consequences they are about to impose on the other person and if any part of them cares. Parents also need to take a long look at themselves. How many cases are there where the female tells her parents that it was clearly consensual sex (many instances where the two are dating) and the parent presses charges? We need to take a careful look at this, too many rapists and sexual assault charges get let go that shouldn’t, while young men are rotting for a judgment made off a lie about age.

The worst part of this is that many of these young women use age as a weapon and are intentionally making these moves to get at someone who breaks up with them, doesn’t want to date them etc… The protocols that surround these charges need to be examined. Most importantly, the female teenagers who make these accusations knowing full well that it’s a lie need to learn how to respect other human beings and themselves.

**This post is the opinion of the author and does not necessarily reflect the opinion of Eden Cafe or Eden Fantasys. Authors are allowed and encouraged to voice their opinions. Please keep discussion – whether in agreement or disagreement – respectful. Thank you.**

Before I was the mother to a darling wee one, my sex life was anything but quiet. I had been known for being loud, leaving marks on walls, spreading too much info whenever I could and showcasing my sexual experiences on my blog. There was even this one time while I was on a sexual escapade- drunken stupor and all- that I busted a window. In general, it’s fair to say that my hoo-ha drama has been an open free-for-all, criticisms and compliments alike, always welcome.

As a new mother I was expecting that things would tone down for a bit, if even for a little while. I also found myself living with the man friends ‘rents- which really doesn’t bother me, but Mr. S/O has a slight issue with his parental units knowing his sexual adventures. Okay, no big deal. I figured it’d take some practice, but I’d be close to a dead fuck in no time.

Now, we are bringing home baby, setting up her little basinet next to our bed and yadda yadda. Oh hell! That’s when it hit, the first moral dilemma of my new mommy life.

“Do I have sex with my kid next to me?”

I have too high of a sex drive to not have any at all!

“Is that even right?”

What does Google say?

“What if she sees?”

I am pretty sure this will scar her, right?

Our closest couple friends who have children all had sex while their children were small and in a bassinet in the room with them. (Apparently some Google results stated that some parents were actually co-sleeping and doing the deed with their babies in the same bed- sorry but that is a little FREAKY in my opinion.) Honestly I really couldn’t picture us going without for however long it took from the bassinet-crib transition. Well guess what? We didn’t.

I was a bit shocked at how easily I found myself craving sex when our daughter was finally asleep. Is there something wrong with me, I questioned. I even found myself having one of those what would Doctor Phil have to say about this, thoughts.

Then that night came; the night I dreaded, the one I figured was eventually going to happen regardless of how quick we rushed the woohoo, or what time we did it, or how quiet we were. Mr. S/O was just getting his kicks off after we’d all doggy-styled it and I was right there- like right there and I glanced over quickly to check on her, only to see two bright blue eyes starring vigorously at the scene before her. My god our kid just saw us getting our freak on! Immediately I felt that little volcano inside me – that had been a whole forty minutes in the making- dissipate. Lucky for somebody else, they’d already reached the climax they’d been anticipating, but no, I was just stopped mid O.

For the next few days I showed her picture book after picture book, hoping that she’d be all Ooo rainbows inside her tiny little head and have the image of mommy and daddy with their sexy time parts shaking about in front of her little face erased from her memory.

Needless to say when we did finally went to have sex again, we made sure she was asleep and turned off all the lights. That way, if she did get up she wasn’t going to see anything traumatic- if it is traumatic to a small child- Google still hasn’t given me an answer.